She leaped to follow him, leaving the blanket in a pile below the window. Adrenaline pushed all the fatigue out of her limbs as she sprinted across the room and caught his shoulder before he crossed into the living room. “LJ, don’t.” She pulled until he turned to face her. “I don’t know what else to say to make you believe me, but you have to. All I wanted was to be close to you. I screwed it up, and I didn’t have a single choice in the matter, okay? Are you seriously going to make it worse by walking out on me right now?” She dropped her hand, hugging her arms over her chest. She wished she wouldn’t have left the blanket behind.

LJ shook his head. “You didn’t screw it up. I did.”

“That’s what I keep telling you!” She shoved him, somehow gratified when he fell back a step. “You said there were no expectations between us. You said whatever we wanted, we could try, no problem. Was all that bullshit? Because I didn’t lie to you, LJ. I freaking told you I didn’t think I’d ever want to have sex again, and suddenly I did, and I would be so happy about that right now if I hadn’t ruined it by acting like a total freak.”

His eyes darkened. “You’re not a freak.”

She snapped a hand out at his clothes. “Right. You’re just leaving because you remembered you left the stove on, right?”

He gritted his teeth, then he dropped his head and blew out a breath. “Shit.”

He reached for her and folded her into his arms. The goose bumps from cold faded away from her skin, but she still stood a little stiffly, not sure whether they were done fighting.

“I’m sorry. I feel bad, and then I don’t always say the right thing . . . I just . . .” He kissed the top of her head, like it might make up for the words he never finished, but she was already tensed against them.

“You just what?”

“Do you think you’ll ever stop feeling him?” he whispered. “When I touch you? Because I want to make you feel good, but knowing that any second, it might remind you of something terrible . . . it makes me want to cut off my own hands.”

Andra closed her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, sweet girl. Please don’t.”

She hugged him tighter, but somehow it didn’t help at all. Her house was so quiet it suffocated any word she might have offered. There was nothing to say anyway. Nothing but lies or a truth that would have him heading for the door all over again.

He kissed her forehead. “I have to go.”