JESSICA: Simon.

SIMON: Don’t say anything, okay?

JESSICA: [calmly] Simon, you’re hurting me.

He immediately lets go. He backs up, hands in the air.

What happened just now?

What was that Simon?

Beat.

SIMON: I’ll wear the costume.

JESSICA: What?

SIMON: Santa.

I’ll do it.

Okay?

I’ll be Santa for you.

SCENE NINE

Noises from a children’s playground.

CAMILLE tries unsuccessfully to unfold the stroller.

LACHLAN appears on stage. Angus is playing offstage in the playground sandpit.

LACHLAN: Daddy’s watching Angus.

Daddy’s watching.

Good work Angus.

Put some in the bucket.

No no, don’t throw the sand.

Naughty naughty—

That’s right. In the bucket.

CAMILLE is still struggling with the stroller.

LACHLAN comes and stands by.

She kicks the stroller.

CAMILLE: It’s fucked.

LACHLAN: Language!

CAMILLE: Come on Lachie, it’s stuffed.

LACHLAN:—

CAMILLE: No, it really is this time.

LACHLAN: You’ll get the hang of it.

Just have another try.

CAMILLE: I.

Can’t.

Do.

It.

LACHLAN: It just takes a bit of patience.

CAMILLE stares at him.

What?

CAMILLE: Fuck off!

CAMILLE storms off.

LACHLAN wheels the stroller off toward Angus.

SCENE TEN

SIMON is in front of his unopened trunk. He runs his hands over it.

LACHLAN, in earphones, reads the news announcement.

LACHLAN: While the hunt continues for missing two-year-old Denis Pritchard, the record temperatures are challenging hopes for a safe recovery. Police helicopters continue to scour the extended areas of bush surrounding the district. Forensic experts have been consulted in an attempt to put together a profile of any possible abductor…

SCENE ELEVEN

SIMON and JESSICA’s place.

Early evening.

It’s the night of JESSICA’s hospital work Christmas party.

JESSICA: It’s past ninety-six hours.

CAMILLE: Would take a miracle now.

JESSICA: Oh God.

LACHLAN: The police say they have a lead.

CAMILLE: Poor mother must be in living hell for leaving him outside alone.

And with Christmas a few days away—

JESSICA: They’re going to have a table at the Christmas party tonight.

Selling cupcakes to raise money for the family.

CAMILLE: Cupcakes!

Sound of Angus crying out.

CAMILLE: [to LACHLAN] Is that Angus?

LACHLAN: Probably your turn by now.

CAMILLE:—

Beat.

LACHLAN: Go on then.

CAMILLE: He probably wants you. /

LACHLAN: Camille. You can do it.

Just go to him. /

CAMILLE: Okay Lachlan.

CAMILLE exits.

LACHLAN: Thanks for inviting us along.

JESSICA:—

CAMILLE enters.

CAMILLE: He’s playing.

Where’s Simon?

JESSICA: [calling out] Simon.

SIMON enters wearing a Santa costume. He is extremely unsure.

Oh babe, you look fantastic.

LACHLAN: Ho ho ho.

CAMILLE: Oh my God, you’re the real thing.

JESSICA: Come on Simon, cheer up!

CAMILLE: Scarily real!

SIMON: Yeah well, Santa’s not real is he?

LACHLAN: Maybe not but he sure is grumpy!

JESSICA: Let me get a photo—everyone squash in.

LACHLAN: I’ll get Angus?

SIMON: No. No photos Jessica.

I said no photos.

JESSICA: Are you kidding?