‘Caleb. I want to hear you say it.’ What was wrong with him? As recently as the lie detector test, he’d been willing – willing enough to look ridiculous – to take a chance to convince people of his innocence. What had changed? I collapsed further into the seat, staring at my fingers.

A moment later, he hadn’t moved.

‘Caleb, you have a defence to plan. Douglas needs to know how to help you deny these charges.’

‘I’m not sure I want to deny them.’

I froze. I couldn’t respond to that announcement while pretending not to hear it. I didn’t scream. Part of me had begun to expect absurdity.

‘Mum?’ He finally insisted on the eye contact he’d been avoiding.

But now I found I could hardly bear to look at him. ‘Caleb, don’t do this. You know what you’re saying isn’t true.’

‘I don’t trust lawyers.’

‘Douglas knows about things like this.’

‘People only take lawyers seriously because of how they look,’ Caleb declared next. ‘I’ve seen him. He looks like Dad. Same flappy robes. It’s ridiculous.’

We sat in stony silence. All the police statements that I’d never been able to read kindled my emotions. Why had Caleb been so unhappy? Had whatever made Stephen leave me also infected Caleb? Would people always turn from me?

Eventually, I stood. Douglas Anderson was due to arrive soon. I needed to meet him outside, to warn him Caleb might refuse to fight.

‘Mum,’ Caleb said, as I was leaving, ‘you’ll remember to feed Pattern for me while I’m in here, won’t you? Sean can’t always do it anymore and Rosie forgets.’

Outside, Stephen had left. I leaned against the wall, waiting for Douglas. I’d thought hearing people call Caleb an arsonist was the worst thing that could possibly happen. But his reaction was so much worse. I missed his goth days, when at least he had a passion. That eyeball ring, the lip piercing scars, the fading hair, were all that was left of that.

Douglas arrived, almost on time, dressed not in robes but in a regular business suit. ‘How are you?’

‘I’m fine. Caleb is not fine. He doesn’t have the slightest interest in defending himself. He doesn’t care about anything. I want you to get him bail.’

Douglas nodded. ‘Stephen has briefed me. And your mother has agreed to cover costs. She’s suspicious of the entire investigation.’

Well, that was one thing.

‘I think we’re ready to go.’ Douglas added something about legal appeals we could make if Caleb was found guilty. Appeals that I recorded before turning a page in my notebook. Of course, the evidence against Caleb was all circumstantial. This didn’t mean it wouldn’t stick. I’d lived with lawyers and knew how justice worked.