I’ve stayed away from them, preferring to get their updates via letter. I told them I was too busy to meet, but the truth is that I’m feeling too many conflicted emotions in their presence. Hawthorne was too handsome, too charming, too perfect at that ball, and the way my body reacted to his is not something I want to repeat. I’d enjoyed the way his hand had felt splayed across my bare back, had wanted to impress him with my magic. When Silene returned and I’d seen him kissing her, a host of emotions swirled through me. I cannot afford to get distracted right now with the mole and the rebels and whatever Mazus is planning.

To keep myself away, I’ve spent my time questioning every spy we have in our network, trying to gather any tidbit of information that might help me uncover the identity of the mole. Using the aether-voice to force them to confess, I’ve crossed a line I swore I’d never cross—using the aether-voice on those loyal to me. Despite the temptation to use the same tactic on every advisor until I’ve uncovered the mole, I have to keep that boundary in place, for my sense of self-worth. So far, I’ve come up completely empty-handed. Whoever the mole is, they’re covering their tracks well. It’s aethers-damned frustrating, and it’s only a matter of time before word reaches Carex that I’ve been questioning the spy network. Though I was careful with what I asked and didn’t reveal I was looking for a mole, Carex is bound to come to me with questions.

Seated at my desk with Lunaria curled up at my feet, I look out at the city from my window view, hoping to find some miraculous clue far off in the distance. The landscape is still green, but winter has fully set in. The air is frigid. It won’t be long before all the trees and other plants undergo their brief period of death before re-blooming. A sharp rap on the door stirs me from my thoughts and aimless staring. I cautiously open the door, then fling it open wider when I see Admon standing there.

“Admon, I wasn’t expecting you. Did I forget a meeting?”

“No, Your Majesty,” he says with a bow. “I’m leaving a committee meeting and desired your company. Will you begrudge an old man a cup of tea?”