She flopped onto the bed, slotting her rolled-up sleeping bag under her head. It wasn’t that she was sleepy. A second cup of coffee would’ve been preferable, but she’d messed up too badly to hang around in the lapa. Clare winced at the thought of what Faye must think of her. How rude she was. How unhinged. Again, she wished the woman hadn’t come back. If only people understood it was better to leave her alone. She was fine on her own. But how could her parents’ friends know that? The Clare they’d known had been sociable, fun, easy-going. She closed her eyes. How could they know what she was like when they hadn’t seen that she’d become another Clare, one not even she knew.

It started shortly before she’d left for university. Clare had always been lean, sporty and, as Michelle said, “a late developer.” While her friends began wearing bras in their early teens, Clare was flat-chested and fine with it. Her mother chuckled and said that it must come from her father’s side of the family since she’d been busty at twelve.

Then, in Clare’s final year of school, things changed. At first, she thought she was simply gaining weight because she wasn’t as active as usual while studying for final exams. But then she saw she finally had breasts. Not only that, but her hips and buttocks were rounding out, too. It was okay until she stopped in at the Mackenzie’s house to borrow some notes from Zach.

She and Zach were sitting in the kitchen, drinking Coke and discussing the tedium of studying, when Derek arrived home from work. Clare had meant to leave earlier but lost track of time.

“I was just on my way,” she said, standing up after she and Derek had greeted one another. She felt his eyes on her and was suddenly aware of how tight her t-shirt and jeans were. She pulled her t-shirt over her stomach.

“You’re looking good, Clare. Quite the young lady,” said Derek.

Zach coloured and jumped to his feet. “Don’t forget the book,” he said, leading her out of the room.

When she got home, she examined herself in the mirror. “Quite the young lady” meant she had breasts. And a bum, waist and hips. What did that mean? She thought of Zach’s uncomfortable reaction to Derek’s comment. She hadn’t experienced anything like it before. She wasn’t sure what it implied but felt unprepared for whatever it might be.

The next day, Clare went running. Michelle was pleased, convinced that spending too much time at her desk wasn’t healthy for her daughter. By the end of the month, Clare was running eight to ten kilometres a day and had lost almost four kilograms. Her new bra was baggy.