Chapters (39)
- Cover
- Title
- Author’s Note
- Glossary
- One
- Two
- Three
- Four
- Five
- Six
- Seven
- Eight
- Nine
- Ten
- Eleven
- Twelve
- Thirteen
- Fourteen
- Fifteen
- Sixteen
- Seventeen
- Eighteen
- Nineteen
- Twenty
- Twenty-One
- Twenty-Two
- Twenty-Three
- Twenty-Four
- Twenty-Five
- Twenty-Six
- Twenty-Seven
- Twenty-Eight
- Twenty-Nine
- Thirty
- Thirty-One
- Thirty-Two
- Thirty-Three
- Thirty-Four
- Acknowledgments
Stop it, she thought. We are not going to be here for much longer. Stay calm. Help is on its way. Focus on what you can do; what might help and inspire hope.
“Can I tell you what I’ve discovered about myself during the past two days? How you’ve helped me? Would you be interested in hearing my ramblings now?” she said.
The girl opened her eyes and blinked. Even that, it seemed, took effort. “Yes. Of course.” Her words were quiet and interspersed with shallow breaths.
“Will you try and eat some orange while you listen?”
“Okay.”
Faye peeled the orange. Its sweet citrus scent made her mouth water. She swallowed the saliva and spoke.
“For a long time, I bought into the belief—not mine, but one that was deftly sold to me—that I am a fearful person. I let it block me, stop me from being who I was and from becoming who I should be.”
She fed Clare a segment. The girl chewed it slowly. Her eyes began to water.
“What is it?” asked Faye. “Is it painful?”
Clare gulped, her eyes closed. “Yes. But . . . don’t . . . stop,” she said. “I can do it if you keep talking and distract me.”
“Are you sure?”
“Sure.”
She opened her mouth and nodded. Faye popped another segment between her lips.
“Okay. Well, being with you, seeing how brave you are—I mean, starting with you choosing to sleep outside at Heuningbos that first night—and also having to go into the wilderness on my own has proved to me what I may have always known but couldn’t acknowledge: I am not afraid. I am not a fearful woman. I can be alone and do things. I am capable and I am brave, brave enough to make some changes. You’ve shown me that.”
Clare blinked. Faye gave her another piece of fruit. She chewed it slowly and closed her eyes as she swallowed it. Then she looked at Faye.
“I’m not brave, but thank you. What . . . what are you going to do? What will you change?”
“I’m going to live alone, find a job and get a dog.”
“Oh? You’re . . . you and Derek?”
“We won’t be together. No.”
They were still for a moment.
“I don’t know if I should be happy about being the one who inspired you to, erm, leave Derek. I mean, it somehow doesn’t—”
“It should have happened decades ago. I would say, Derek and I should never have married, but then I wouldn’t have Zach and that is unthinkable.”
Clare’s mouth lifted in a tiny smile. “Then I am happy for you. But perhaps don’t mention to anyone that you think I had anything to do with the decision. I’ve done enough to disappoint my folks.”