Mostly. I still felt the hollowness in my stomach that let me know something bad was probably going to happen, though I felt that all the time, so it wasn’t like it was very accurate. And anyway, the dance felt like an incident in itself. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. I was supposed to have a group of friends, like, eight of them, and we were supposed to all get ready together and then take pictures with our awkward dates and even my version of normal, which was spending that time with Olivia, wasn’t happening. Instead, my best friend hated me, I hated my best friend, and a girl I’d known for five months and a boy I’d known for three were the centre of my universe.

June. She’d make this all OK. Wouldn’t she? Except after everything that happened, the thought of her wasn’t even filling me up like it used to.

But maybe that could change. Maybe there’d be a marvellous shift in the air tonight and everything would feel OK and right. June. Cleaned-up June. June in a dress. June dancing. I so badly wanted to see June dancing.

Did I, though?

Because now every time I thought of her my mouth went acidic and I felt the need to spit to clear the taste away.

So when she called at three that day while I was FaceTiming with Leo, after I’d already put on my tux because I was so excited, my gut splattered across the walls.

‘It’s June,’ I said to Leo. ‘Hold on.’

Something was wrong. I knew it.

‘Hey, Whitaker.’

‘Uh, hi. What’s up?’

‘So, there’s been a development: I don’t think I’m actually gonna be able to make it tonight.’

There it was. Splat. ‘I … why? What’s the matter?’

‘Nothing’s the matter.’

‘Why are you just – lying, right now?’

A pause. ‘I’m not lying. Just – don’t worry about it, OK?’

‘How can I not worry about it when you –’

‘I hope you have a good break, and I hope you and Leo have fun. All right? I’ll see you … some time.’

I went to say goodbye but she’d already hung up.

She didn’t even sound upset. Her voice was completely monotone. Like it hadn’t meant anything.

Leo’s face appeared on the screen, and I think he was looking for a reaction from me, but I just stared. ‘What was that about?’ he asked.

I tried to keep the camera pointed at my face as best I could with my shaking hands. ‘June’s not coming.’

‘Shit. Why? What happened?’