I folded my flying leathers on top and added my black gold bow, then used a couple of pillows to prevent the egg from rolling around. Then I locked it and didn’t let the servants carry it out until they’d sworn to do so with the utmost care. I still ended up following them down to the courtyard to watch them load it.

When they were done, I started back to my room to do a last check for belongings to take with me, my mind lost in daydreams of hatching the crow, of feeling the wind against my skin again and the endless strength of a crow beneath me.

I almost walked straight into Ericen. He caught me, and I reeled back from his touch. He grinned. “Where are you coming from in such a state? You’re practically glowing.”

I tried to step past him, but he wouldn’t let me. Scowling, I stepped back. “What, Ericen?”

“You know, that’s the first time you’ve addressed me by name.”

“Is there a point to this? Because I have things to do.”

His smile faded, as if my abruptness had bothered him. “We’re going to be traveling together for nearly a week. And if you haven’t forgotten, we’re engaged.” It took effort not to cringe at those words. “I thought you and I should…I don’t know. Start over.”

“Start over?” I laughed. “Is this a joke or just more of your games?”

“Neither. I mean it. I’m not what you think. What would I get out of lying to you?”

“The usual sick pleasure.”

He sighed, moving out of my way. “Just think about it, please. It’d certainly make traveling a lot better.”

I stalked past him, keeping my expression neutral though my mind was a maelstrom of thoughts. Flustered by the conversation, nervous about leaving, anxious about the egg, I felt like a storm readying to break. I needed air.

Diverting from the stairs, I walked quickly down the hall and out through a side door that opened onto the south grounds. Crisp morning air cooled the fire in my veins, but it couldn’t settle the turbulence gathering inside me.

One moment, Ericen dug so far under my skin I wanted to pummel him, and the next, he acted like he’d been misunderstood. I hated these games, the deception and confusion. I wanted straightforward. I wanted clear lines and paths that didn’t split.

I followed a winding dirt path through the gardens to the royal graveyard. A black metal fence surrounded dark stone mausoleums spread across thick grass, and I had to navigate to their center to find the simple grave my mother had requested. A small crow statue perched on the tombstone with wings spread, fallen leaves scattered across the grave.