SILVIO cries.

DOTTORE: Bravo. [Good boy.]

CLARICE: Oh, Silvio …

SMERALDINA shakes her head.

… cruel Silvio.

SMERALDINA nods in approval.

SILVIO: Please, Signora Clarice, have pity.

CLARICE: I will …

SMERALDINA shakes her head.

… not!

SILVIO: Cara, my dear … I beg your forgiveness for my cruelty.

SMERALDINA gestures ‘and’.

CLARICE: And …

SILVIO: Stupidity …

SMERALDINA gestures ‘and’.

CLARICE: And …

SMERALDINA mimes something to CLARICE.

And for your misogynistic and unwarranted sexist rant about women?

SMERALDINA gives her the thumbs up.

SILVIO: And for that too. Forgive me.

CLARICE: I have forgiven you.

SMERALDINA: [aside] That makes one of us.

SILVIO: Ti amo! [I love you!]

CLARICE: Amore mio. [My love.] I love you too. [To SMERALDINA] Can I kiss him?

SMERALDINA: Of course. [Aside] That’s the best bit!

PANTALONA: Viva gli sposi! [Long live the bride and groom!]

DOTTORE: And now my work here is done. I shall go and draw up the paperwork immediately.

DOTTORE exits.

BEATRICE enters.

BEATRICE: With your good graces, permission to enter.

PANTALONA: Signora Beatrice! Where is Brighella, I’ve got a bone to pick with him. He misled me! He assured me that Federigo was in fact Federigo. But he wasn’t! Federigo was you!

BEATRICE: Dear Signora Pantalona, please do not be angry with Brighella. Who wouldn’t have been tricked? Federigo and I were siblings, twins, two halves of an apple. With these clothes, Brighella couldn’t have doubted it was Federigo.

PANTALONA: Fine. It’s over. Now what do you want?

BEATRICE: Signora Pantalona, Signori, I am here to ask for your forgiveness, if for fault of my own I have inconvenienced you.

CLARICE: Think nothing of it.

She embraces her.

SILVIO: Err.

BEATRICE: What, she can’t even hug a woman?

SILVIO: Those clothes still give me the heebie-jeebies.

PANTALONA: Fine. You are forgiven. And your boyfriend?

BEATRICE: Yes, thank heavens, Florindo is alive.

PANTALONA: That’s great.

A knock is heard.

Smeraldina, see who that is.

SMERALDINA: [shouting] Come in!

TRUFFALDINO enters.

TRUFFALDINO: Your humble and reverent servant at your service for all you good signori [sirs and madams]. Signor Florindo is here and wants permission to enter.

PANTALONA: Permission granted.

TRUFFALDINO: [shouting] Come in! [To SMERALDINA.] Ciao, bella. [Hello, beautiful.]

SMERALDINA: Ciao, bello. [Hello, handsome.]

FLORINDO enters.

FLORINDO: Your humble servant. [To PANTALONA] Are you the master of the house?

SILVIO: Sì, I am the master … but not of this house.

PANTALONA: I am.

FLORINDO: La riverisco. [I revere you.]

PANTALONA: Riverita. [I am revered.]

SMERALDINA: [to CLARICE] Cara Signora [Dear Madam], I would like to ask you a favour.

CLARICE: What do you want?

SMERALDINA: [to CLARICE] I too am a very pretty young single lady who’d like to marry. The servant of Signora Beatrice is interested. Could you give your consent?

CLARICE: Sì, Smeraldina, I’ll do it gladly.

SILVIO: Signor, do you recognise me?

FLORINDO: Yes, you are the savage who challenged Beatrice to a duel.

SILVIO: Yes, it was poor form. Forgive me. Fortunately she disarmed me and saved my life.