TRUFFALDINO: I thought we were looking for him after lunch?

FLORINDO: [aside] I wonder how I can find out if Beatrice is here?

TRUFFALDINO: What about lunch?

FLORINDO: I can’t possibly eat right now. My heart is in my stomach.

TRUFFALDINO: I wish your heart was in my stomach.

FLORINDO: [aside] I’ll go to the post office, maybe I’ll get some more information.

TRUFFALDINO: Oh, my stomach!

FLORINDO: I’m leaving to take care of urgent business. I’ll eat later this evening. Meet me in piazza [the town square] with news about Pasquale. Oh, and put this purse in my trunk.

FLORINDO exits.

TRUFFALDINO: If he doesn’t want to eat, fine, but I’m not one for fasting. Vado a mangiare … [I’m going to eat …]

BEATRICE enters.

BEATRICE: Truffaldino!

TRUFFALDINO: Uffa. [Ugh.]

BEATRICE: Did Signora Pantalona give you a purse with one hundred ducats?

TRUFFALDINO: Sì Signor.

BEATRICE: Why then didn’t you give it to me?

TRUFFALDINO: Was it meant for you?

BEATRICE: What did she say when she gave it to you?

TRUFFALDINO: She said, [imitating PANTALONA] ‘Give this to your master’.

BEATRICE: And who is your master?

TRUFFALDINO: You are. Ah, so then it is yours! Ecco. [Here it is.]

BEATRICE: Is it all there?

TRUFFALDINO: I haven’t touched a cent.

BEATRICE: [aside] I’ll count it, just to be sure.

TRUFFALDINO: [aside] Problem solved. Oh no, what will the other one say? Well, if it wasn’t his in the first place he won’t say a thing.

BEATRICE: Truffaldino, tell Brighella I have a friend dining with me and to quickly prepare a table.

TRUFFALDINO: How many dishes did you want?

BEATRICE: Signora Pantalona is not a fancy woman. Tell him a few pizzas and the house wine will be fine.

TRUFFALDINO: Got it. [Aside] Now he will see what a great waiter I am too.

BEATRICE: Oh, and take this and put it in my trunk. It is a cheque for four thousand ducats.

TRUFFALDINO: Duc me! Sì Signor.

BEATRICE exits.

SCENE FOUR

TRUFFALDINO: I must make a good impression. I want to show my master my mad skills. I’ll put this away first and then … No I’ll put it away later, I don’t want to waste time. Hey! Anyone there?

BRIGHELLA enters.

BRIGHELLA: What is it, Truffaldino?

TRUFFALDINO: My master has a friend for lunch and he’d like me to order.

BRIGHELLA: I can quickly whip something out.

TRUFFALDINO: Okay, tell me what have you got?

BRIGHELLA: For two people, we can do two servings of four dishes, okay?

TRUFFALDINO: Or five of six or six of eight, nine of ten is fine too. What are the specials?

BRIGHELLA: For entrée we have a zucchini flower soup with shards of tender organic venison carpaccio, seasoned with pink mustard fruits and saltbush peppercorns. For main we have a duck terrine risotto lasagne with saffron peas and a basil butter reduction emulsion. Or a braised goat ball … with porcini and rosemary jus on a bed of deconstructed spaghetti marinara polenta. For dessert you have a choice between the bouncy lavender panna cotta napping on fairy floss sorbet or the salty sweet onion marmalade praline beer jelly topped with champagne foam at the mouth.