“I’m your best friend because it’s true.” She let out a little wistful sigh. “And have you considered the possibility that you’re making him want you more by refusing to date him?”

“How do you figure that?”

“Don’t you remember that one interview he did for Entertainment Monthly where he said something about how one of the reasons that he joined the military was because everything in his life was too easy, it was all being handed to him and he wanted something he had to work for? Something that not everyone could do. That’s you. You’re making him work for you, and it’s probably a novel experience for him. Keeping him at arm’s length is probably just going to have the opposite effect.”

That was just Shelby speculating. She didn’t know that for sure, so I said, “I don’t think that’s true.”

“Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. But let me just say—ahoy, mateys. I’m onboard this ship.” She playfully saluted me.

Now it was my turn to sigh. “What ship? There’s no relationship.”

“Just because you’re in denial about what’s happening doesn’t mean it’s not happening. You certainly are dating him. You go places with him. You spend your evenings together. You’re kissing him. You are in a relationship.”

That panicky feeling, the one that had been my almost constant companion lately, returned, making my pulse race. “I can’t be.”

“Why not?”

“He doesn’t know.” I whispered the words, barely able to say them. I’d pushed this thing so far out of my head that it was painful to be speaking them out loud.

“Doesn’t know what?”

“The first time we met, I told him . . .” My throat felt dry and I swallowed, hard. “I told him I didn’t know who he was. That I’d never heard of him.”

This got her back to her feet. “Are you serious?”

I nodded.

“You have to tell him.”

“I can’t. It would ruin everything.” I felt tears forming at the edges of my eyes, and I tried blinking them away.

She sat next to me. “I think we both know that the right thing to do here is for you to tell him.”

“Do we, though? Despite what you think, we’re not in a relationship. We haven’t made any kind of commitment to each other. We’re hanging out. I’ll hopefully get over my kissing thing, and then he’ll fly to someplace like France to film a movie and this will die a natural death. There’s no reason to upset everything right now. Not to mention, I’m not going to get you fired from this job. You’re the one that said it’s your last shot.”

“I’ll find another job.”

“Not like this one, you won’t. And we both know it.”