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Dedication

For Gray, forever and always

Epigraph

Give me to the wild beasts: their jaws will devour me.

—The Epic of the Narte

Prologue

I am too late.

I know this before my fingers grasp the handle. Before the heavy oak door melts under my palm, and I see bodies reduced to flashing eyes and teeth under a black light.

Unknown hands press against my skin. Music pulses through the floor. The air tastes like spilled beer, cheap cologne, and vomit. I fight against the urge to be sick.

My eyes scan the foyer.

There’s a commotion on the stairs. A man throws a glass bottle and it explodes against the wall. Raised voices. A woman holds her drink aloft. She turns as I barrel past her, as if she knows I do not belong.

I take the steps two at a time. A couple writhes on the landing, grasping and pawing at me as I struggle to break free.

“Have you seen—” I ask.

But they only point upward, so I keep going.

The air grows brittle in my lungs as I climb. Higher and higher. The music tumbles away, and I hear laughter. His laughter. Coming from the other end of the hall.

Light streams through the door as I stumble through it.

There’s a flash of recognition in his eyes, but he’s already tilting backward, hand outstretched, mouth wide with surprise.

A half dozen men stand, laughter frozen on their lips. No one moves as I tear through them, propelling myself forward by pushing my hands against their shoulders.

But I’m not fast enough.

I’m never fast enough.

By the time I reach the window ledge, the night air has swallowed him, and he’s falling, still falling, with his fingers reaching out for me.

The vision disappears in mist, but the pain remains in my chest.

No matter how many times I race through those halls, the ending is the same.

Even in my dreams, I cannot save him.

PART I

One

Tuesday, November 12, 10:00 A.M.