"I see. She'll be quite put off if you choose someone else."

"Her feelings are not of primary importance to me, succeeding is."

"Well," he said in a sigh. "You can do one of two things; you can ask the panel to choose a new advocate for you, or you can choose your own, provided they accept."

I looked up into his consoling eyes. "Would you accept?"

"Are you asking me?"

"Yes Samas, I'm asking you. Would you be my advocate?"

He thought for a moment. "I will. But I will not tell her that there has been a change. That's your responsibility, agreed?"

"It's a deal." I shook his hand but began to question my decision as soon as I pulled my hand away. He was right about the Ascension going well and that was as much to her credit as it was to mine. I've just never liked being in the dark, that's how I've managed to stay ahead as I have. Most of the surprises that hit you in life affect you for the worse. I've conditioned myself to be fearful that way. That's what I feared most about her, justifiably so.

The entire ride home I thought about how to tell her, and how she would take it. Vengeance was a handy vehicle, but unnecessary. I wanted her and despised her. I loved her for what she was and hated her for who she was. But perhaps more importantly, I understood her and realized then that I didn't want to.

I awoke the next morning with a headache and an overwhelming sense of anxiety about confronting Poppy. Samas was sitting at the dining room table with Mr. Diltz and two others I recognized from the gallery when I walked in.

"Good day Herr Michaels. Some coffee?" Mr. Diltz asked.

"I'm hungry actually."

"I'll have some fresh rolls brought out," he said getting up.

I smiled at the three and sat down. A thin, hard looking middle-aged woman smoked next to Samas. Her black hair was pulled into a bun so tight it seemed to smooth some of the wrinkles around her small bloodshot eyes. The young woman next to her looked no older than 18 or 19. She wore an expensive men's two-piece business suit obviously re-cut to her figure.

"Did you really watch that fire develop in the back of a police car?" the bun woman asked.

"Yep."

"I can picture that in my head. That must have been something."

"Very," I said. Samas was paying attention, but the woman in the suit looked bored and distracted as if I'd interrupted a conversation about me. Diltz brought a basket of rolls in and sat them on the table when I heard a door slide open behind me. Samas' facial reaction told me it was Poppy.

"Hello Bando," Samas said.

"Hello Juan," she replied snidely. The sound of her voice drained me of what little courage I had mustered.

"Can I get you anything, Madame?" Diltz asked her.