After they discussed a few other particulars, it became apparent that it was time to leave, though everyone resisted making the first move. Paralysis had set in due to the fact that there was something so grim and unnatural about the tasks that faced all of them, Maryann in particular. Her eyes had taken on a permanent glaze, and her movements seemed robotic. Carolyn found it hard to believe that Maryann, the little girl who had already known such tragedy in her young life, now had to carry this burden. At least they would be able to help her through the visit to Danny and Rachel’s house later that day. Now Maryann displayed maturity beyond her years yet again.

“Thanks so much,” she said to Tom and Anna, “both of you, for letting us meet here, and for arranging the meeting with Dave Thompson. It would have been horrible to have gone down to the police station and put up with those awful reporters.”

“Maryann, it’s the least we could do,” they said almost in unison.

When Mitch and Carolyn climbed into their car, they simply sat there, immobile, trying to absorb and process all that they had learned in the last few hours. When they had arrived, they had been under the impression that Danny had snapped and shot his wife and child and then himself. The details Dave Thompson had shared moved this tragedy into a whole new realm. Carolyn sat quietly, staring ahead, exhausted, perplexed, angry, sad, unable to process the enormity of the events that had taken place over the last forty-eight hours. The complexity of emotions left her with an overwhelming feeling of dread. A dense fog had descended, and at that moment she couldn’t imagine ever again feeling an emotion that might be described as “normal,” let alone something presently as foreign as “happiness.” Mitch looked over at her and thought she was probably in shock. This must be what shock looks like, he thought. What if she never comes out of it? What if she sinks deeper? He realized that the impact on his wife would be much more severe than on him. He felt helpless and frightened.

“Are you all right?” he offered, expecting her to nod mechanically that she was. Instead she looked directly at him and said, “I don’t think I will ever be ‘all right’ again, Mitch,” and she turned to continue her silent vigil. This was not good. Mitch always needed to fix things, and right now things were very broken. When he suggested they go check in at the hotel, Carolyn vehemently shook her head from side to side. So they continued to sit there in silence.