“What’s happening?” I yell at him, but he runs right past me, his eyes still on Tessa as he chases her across the lawn.

“My clone set fire to one of the dorms, that’s what happened!” Jake shouts back. I run to catch up to him, with Ollie on my heels.

“How?” I yell over the blare of the fire alarm.

“With a lit joint,” Jake practically snarls as he finally catches up to Tessa, grabbing her and pulling her to the ground. That’s when Jake—impersonator Jake—shows up, jumping on top of his original. The two Jakes begin to wrestle each other on the grass, with the entire school watching, including Jago, who has surfaced and is standing next to me and the other Similars.

“Holy crap,” is all Jago can utter. I scan the dorms for signs of smoke. I don’t see any. The Jakes are still fighting each other on the lawn. Archer runs up to help Tessa to her feet—she’s frantically throwing on her clothes—and he tries to stop the fight between the Jakes, but to no avail. They’re still going at each other, with no intention of stopping.

I never thought I’d be happy to see Principal Fleischer, but when she emerges, stumbling onto the grass and looking furious, I’m relieved. Following her are three other teachers who look dazed and zoned-out. From the other direction, five more teachers emerge, several in their pajamas and two wearing robes.

“Attention!” Fleischer yells over the blare of the fire alarm. “Attention!”

The fire alarm stops. The ensuing silence is almost shocking, after all that noise and commotion. Even the Jakes stop fighting each other and lie back on the grass, spent.

“I’ve just been alerted by the system that the fire has been extinguished. The damage to the dormitory was minimal,” Fleischer says, livid. “However,” she adds, “someone drugged every single teacher at this school. Repeatedly. Which is why we’ve been asleep for more than a day, oblivious to the complete and utter mayhem that has transpired in our absence. It goes without saying that this kind of behavior will not be tolerated, and that whoever was responsible for that fire, and for administering injectives to Darkwood’s faculty, will be fully and uncompromisingly punished. In the meantime, return to your dorm rooms, and do not leave them for the next three hours, until lunch. If it were up solely to me, I’d keep you there all day. But the board feels you are entitled to meals.” With those last words, Fleischer turns to the other teachers, speaking sternly with them while the student body dissects everything that just happened, from the dance on Friday up until now.