She finishes her glass of wine, then another. She begins to feel better. Derry and Clive come down and announce they’re off to have dinner in the city. They might stay over in a hotel for a night or two, and can Tom manage on his own for that long?

‘No,’ Tom says. ‘It’ll all be obliterated by the time you get back.’

Clive points at Tom and draws a line across his neck with his finger.

‘Have an incredible time, you two,’ Aurelia says, arms outstretched. ‘You so deserve it.’ She blows them both drunken kisses.

When they leave, Aurelia pours herself the rest of the bottle. Tom says nothing. She deserves it. If the shoe was on the other foot he couldn’t cope. Nine months without wine? Forget it. Childbirth? Not without being knocked out first, and for about six months afterwards.

‘I wouldn’t wish a marriage like theirs on my worst enemy,’ Aurelia says with a sneer.

Tom double-takes. ‘What, Clive and Derry?’

‘Mmmm.’

‘Why’s that?’

‘Tom.’ She says his name flatly, as if he’s missed a whole chapter. He pushes his glasses up his nose, in that way that signals he hasn’t a clue what’s going on.

‘He’s your friend, Tom. Surely you know …’

‘Know what?’

She rolls her eyes and swirls the wine in her glass. ‘About his affairs? Apparently he’s had loads of them. Derry always takes him back. Apparently she says it’s just the way he’s built, can you believe that?’

Tom looks genuinely confused. ‘Clive has affairs?’

She laughs, flicks her long buttery hair across her shoulder. ‘Oh, Tom.’

His eyebrows lift in surprise. ‘He’s never mentioned it.’

He looks cute when he’s befuddled. ‘Never?’

‘No. I mean, guys don’t tend to … share the way women do.’

‘Bollocks. He’s got to have said something …’

‘… I mean, we’ll pass comment on whether we find someone attractive, but that’s hardly the same, is it?’

‘You tell me.’

He catches her eye and her meaning at once. ‘I didn’t mean … Look, Clive has never mentioned anything like this to me. But some blokes do that, don’t they?’

She’s struggling to follow him. ‘Do what?’

‘Affairs. Look at Matt and Clare. He’s had a few, hasn’t he?’

‘One, I think.’

‘What about Shrek and Fiona?’

‘Who?’

He grins. ‘You know who I mean.’

She laughs. ‘What, Chris and Anoushka?’

‘Yeah.’

‘He so does not look like Shrek.’

‘Yes he does. That’s how you knew who I was talking about.’

She covers her face with her hands. ‘Oh blimey, I can’t unsee that now. He has the ears and everything.’

‘Didn’t he go off with one of her colleagues for a bit?’

‘I think they’re back together now …’

‘They’ve had problems for years, though.’