“All right,” I told Richard. “I will make the choice that you have entrusted to me.” I was flattered to be so praised, I suppose.

And so our plans were made. Now, would you like me to tell you how it all went wrong?

20. How It All Went Wrong

How It All Went Wrong

“INDEED,” SAID POIROT. “TELL us. Catchpool and I, we are agog.”

“It was my fault,” said Jennie, whose voice was hoarse by now. “I am a coward. I was afraid to die. Desolate as I was without Patrick, I had grown comfortable in my unhappiness and I didn’t want my life to end. Any sort of life, even one filled with torment, is preferable to a state of nothingness! Please don’t condemn me as unchristian for saying so, but I’m not sure I believe in an afterlife. I grew more and more afraid as the agreed date for the executions came closer—afraid of having to kill. I thought about what would be involved, imagined standing in a locked room and watching Richard drink poison, and I didn’t want to have to do it. But I had agreed! I had promised.”

“The plan that seemed so easy months before started to seem impossible,” said Poirot. “And of course you could not speak of your fears to Richard Negus, who esteemed you so highly. He might think less of you if you admitted to serious doubts. You perhaps were afraid he would take it upon himself to execute you with or without your consent.”

“Yes! I was terrified that he would. You see, from our discussions of the subject, I knew how important it was to him that all four of us should die. He told me on one occasion that if Harriet and Ida had not allowed themselves to be persuaded, he would have ‘done what needed to be done without their consent.’ That was how he put it. Knowing that, how could I go to him and tell him I had changed my mind, that I was prepared neither to die nor to kill?”

“I imagine you chided yourself for your reluctance, mademoiselle. You believed, did you not, that this killing and dying was the right and honorable thing to do?”

“With the rational part of my mind, yes, I did,” said Jennie. “I hoped and prayed that I would discover in myself an extra reserve of courage that would enable me to go through with it.”

“What did you plan to do about Nancy Ducane?” I asked her.