Thankfully, now it was Monday, everything was back to normal. Brian left for his shift at 7 a.m. and Emily bolted out of the door, late, with a piece of cold toast in her hand at 8.10 a.m. The school bus would already be at the stop, but she always cut it fine and had only missed it once. That one time was awkward enough, though. Brian was at work, Tiff was unavailable, and Louisa had ended up paying for a taxi to get her to school. There’d been very few occasions in the past that Louisa regretted her decision not to drive and because her mum had been so involved when Emily was a baby, often taking them out, she hadn’t had reason to. Louisa had passed her test at seventeen but had only driven for just over a year – driving had never been something she’d felt confident doing.

Now, the feeling of being restricted with a newborn and being stuck inside the house, or only able to venture within walking distance unless she wanted to chance public transport with her screaming baby, made her think she should’ve been braver. Too late now.

The house was quiet and Louisa hoped she wasn’t jinxing it when she thought to herself that Noah had become more settled in the last few days. He definitely wasn’t crying as much. The break from her had done him good, clearly. She’d heard once that babies pick up on their mother’s moods, so it was likely he’d been distressed because Louisa was, and not the other way around. It was an interesting thought.

Louisa downed her third coffee and stared out into the street from the lounge window. The caffeine content was the only reason she drank it; she didn’t care for its bitter taste. She had to stay alert today. No more memory lapses, no more panic about whether she’d fed Noah. She had an idea. Placing her coffee on the table, she got a pen and pad of paper from the table drawer and put the day and date, then listed times from 7 a.m. to 6 p.m. in columns. Those were the times she’d be on her own today. Emily was going to her friend Evie’s straight from school to work on her science project, and Evie’s dad would drop her home after they’d eaten tea. Brian was due home between half five and six.

Louisa put a tick next to 7 a.m. Noah hadn’t fed for very long – literally two minutes, which wasn’t usual – but he’d seemed satisfied after. She recorded that too. Doing this meant she’d keep on top of things and if her memory blurred, she had this written proof she’d fed him.