‘So that’s ground rule number one,’ Elias panted. ‘Hoovering. Twice a week. And secondly, make sure you are doing. The. Grass. Every. SINGLE. WEEK. Because I’ll find out if you don’t.’ He said this with delighted menace, and continued, ‘And rule three is weekly house visits. I will visit this property EVERY WEEK to confirm that you are keeping it IN A FIT STATE and, to be honest, I don’t trust you so I might do the odd surprise visit too –’

Here, Alexa made another sound as if to interrupt, but again thought better of it.

‘And if anything happens with those pipes again, then it’ll be YOU who pays, not me’ – Elias looked at Alexa here – ‘whatever your fancy lawyer says. I’ll get my own and we’ll take you to court for that.’ He crossed his arms again. ‘WELL? Understood?’

Jack and Ellen cowered.

Alexa managed a weak, ‘Yes, Elias.’

He eyed them all beadily for a few moments. Then he cleared his throat and clapped both hands together again.

The noise made Jack jump.

‘Right, Cynth?’

She did not look up.

‘Let’s go, shall we? We’ve got to be in West Norwood in twenty minutes.’ Wordlessly and, indeed, without looking up from her phone, Cynthia walked down the path towards the street, still tapping at her phone with those long nails.

Elias stepped down from the doorstep and jabbed a finger right under Jack’s nose.

Jack felt his heart pounding in his ears. He stared at the stubby, fleshy finger.

‘I’m watching you lot,’ Elias said. He waggled the finger once, for good measure, then strode off down the path after his wife.

In unison, the three of them watched as Cynthia climbed into the wrong seat – the driver’s – which inspired a roar of frustration from Elias. Once she had moved – again, without saying a word or looking up from her phone screen – he swung himself into the car and slammed the door so loudly that Jack winced. He pulled out of his parking space at speed, narrowly avoiding a woman who was cycling down the road. Elias stuck a fist out of the window, then put his foot on the accelerator and tore off down the road.

‘Jesus.’ Ellen exhaled, loudly.

They all turned together to look at the front door. In spite of everything, Jack smiled at the familiar scene.

‘Thank God he couldn’t get in to see the damage the firemen did to the attic door,’ Alexa said, with a shudder. ‘We’ll need to get that sorted too.’

‘One thing at a time,’ Ellen said, grimly. ‘On which note’ – Ellen put a finger in the air and then dived into the zip pocket of her cross-body bag, emerging with three silver keys – ‘before I forget.’ She passed one each to Alexa and Jack.

‘Hero.’ Alexa put hers straight on to a keyring.