I leaned in, hoping to impress her with my own relationship scars. "Six months ago I was engaged. She was actually one of my students, an undergrad in biology. She waited until final grades were posted, then broke up with me while I was lying in a hospital bed. Told me she sold the engagement ring and was using the money to go to Cancun on Christmas break with her new boyfriend."

Her laugh energized my soul. "Well, are we no' two peas in a pod. So tell me, Zachary Wallace, how does it feel tae finally be a big shot scientist?"

"I don't know, am I famous or infamous?"

"Ye located a giant squid, I'd say ye're famous. Just like ye aye wanted. I can still remember you an' me dissectin' fish an' frogs an' birds in yer father's cellar."

"That's right, I forgot about that."

"No' me, I remember everythin'. Tae me, those were my good times. Did True tell ye I'm takin' a correspondence course at the local college."

"That's terrific."

"No, but it's a start. I'm learnin' all sorts o' stuff. Did ye know an ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain?"

"No, but I won't forget it."

She smiled, then became melancholy. "I read about yer sub sinkin'. One o' the men died, eh?"

"It was an accident."

"I know. I was relieved ye came out okay."

"Technically, I drowned."

"The article said ye nearly drowned."

"Nope, I was dead. Pffffttt."

"An' exactly how does one know if one's dead? You see a heavenly light?"

"Sort of" Feeling antsy, I looked over my shoulder to see where True was with those drinks. He was at the bar, absorbed in a conversation with two scantily clad Scandinavian women who were showing him their belly-button rings.

I signaled for a waitress.

"So Zack, what does one do after one returns from the dead?"

"Get drunk, become depressed, and return to the Highlands, what else?"

We laughed and talked and drank and ate and flirted. An hour later, we slipped out of the pub and walked half-drunk through the center of town, arm in arm, and I knew then that I had never loved Lisa, at least I had never been "in love" because what I was feeling now was like walking on air.

"Did True tell ye how I earn my wages?" she asked.

"He was vague. Something about working in Brackla."

"I run a tour boat from the docks o' the Clansman Hotel. It's a used Sea Angler, just over nine meters. Topside's got benches, enough tae accommodate sightseers, down below's where I live. Want tae see?"

It was the kind of line a man might wait his whole life to hear, but the thought of getting on a boat docked at night in Loch Ness sobered me up like a pot of coffee.