The Moth Man’s coat still dripped. His hair looked like a dog’s fur just before it shakes off the rain, and people made a big gap to let him pass.

I was brave. I got sooo close. Could have reached out and touched. The coat wasn’t skin after all, but some oily fabric I’ve never seen before, and it smelt of horsey sawdust. He reminded me of a whopping, untrustworthy spider, and I got all jumpy again. I quite like spiders, but that feeling doesn’t seem right for a human.

Mum blocked me. ‘Where do you think you’re going?’

‘Just—’

‘Oh no you don’t. Mind your own business.’ She gave me the stare of destruction.

The Moth Man was stomping off on heavy boots that would probably have liked to kick a few legs on the way out. Slipping away. Soon there was no sign of anyone towering and battishly cloaked.

‘Can we just go, then? Home? This is for old people.’

‘Nope. We’re here to stay, and it won’t kill you. We’re still the new ones round here. We have to show our faces.’

‘As if anyone’s even noticed us—’

‘Don’t argue with me, Alfie Bradley. Stay where I can see you. Don’t break anything – in fact, don’t touch anything. And don’t forget to say “please” and “thank you”.’

Lily popped up behind her. ‘Yeah, Alfie, zero touching. Got it?’

What was I supposed to do? I toured the hall, but there was nothing cool in the entire room, just stinky clothes piled on tables like junk mountains. Boring – until Lily came up to me, giggling behind her hand.

‘There’s a full-on shouty-crackers fight in the kitchen,’ she said, signalling me to follow. It didn’t look like a Lily wind-up, and Mum was bending over a stall.

‘They’re arguing about your giant,’ Lily said. ‘He rescues weird animals from abroad and they keep escaping and Mr Fuming says it’s dangerous and Mrs Cranky says it isn’t.’

‘Who? Who?’

She took me to a tiny corridor between the main hall and the kitchen. The kitchen door wasn’t completely closed, and through the gap we could see the old lady from the electrical-junk stall leaning against the counter. She was the one rowing, and she was doing it with an old man I hadn’t seen before, and because the noise from the main hall was like a million murmuring penguins, we were the only ones listening.