“Shut up, you filthy Polack.” Fritzsch picked me up by the shoulders and shook me, eyes alight with malicious pleasure. “You’re reassigned to Block 11. You can watch 16670 die.” He threw me to the ground, where I curled into a sobbing heap.

I knew it would work, you stupid, evil bastard.

Fritzsch ordered the prisoners to clear space around me and watch while he rewarded me further for my outburst. I had a feeling he’d be too impatient to wait for the public display of punishment that always accompanied evening roll call. I lifted my head to scan my audience of indifferent prisoners and amused SS officers. One officer stood out, an older man who appeared uncomfortable; he looked familiar, but I didn’t have time to determine why.

I knew what was coming, the punishment I’d gambled on whether my plan worked or not. This was the only way to get what I wanted. Despite the terror of anticipation hanging over me, I would fight through it.

I was huddled on the ground, waiting to be medically cleared to withstand punishment, when Fritzsch’s booted footsteps drew near. He grabbed the back of my collar and gathered the thin fabric in both hands. I cowered, expecting him to hoist me up; instead he pulled. The rip sounded like a death scream. Why had he torn my uniform?

His whip whistled through the air.

Pure, piercing agony tore across my back and wrenched a sound from my throat, a shriek unlike any I’d made before. Fritzsch wasn’t following protocol at all. He was just eager to watch me bleed.

My Gestapo interrogation had been child’s play compared to this. The pain was even worse than I’d feared. But I knew what was expected of me.

“Eins. Zwei. Drei.” With words that sounded more like sobs, I counted the lashes aloud, but upon my fourth blow my mind went blank. Four in German, what’s four in German? Hurry, I’ve known this language my whole life—

A piercing whistle, the bite against my back. The fifth lash. I was too late. I’d lost count. And I knew what happened when the prisoner lost count.

“Start again!” Fritzsch shouted. The satisfaction in his voice was unmistakable.

Tears sprang to my eyes as the leather clawed my flesh, and the word fought to emerge through my gritted teeth. “Eins.”

We kept going, blow after torturous blow, while my gasping sobs and cries marked each new stripe. The pain was overwhelming, harsher than any I’d ever known, and I couldn’t make another mistake, couldn’t take much more of this.