‘The Golden Twins didn’t know how to handle this. If they’d been expecting a serious discussion, maybe some negotiation, they were out of luck. They must’ve realized by then that they were dealing with a total moron. It was clear that Tyler wasn’t the sort of person you could have any kind of sensible conversation with. They leant over and talked to each other, and it was then, while they were distracted, that Tyler decided to attack. Bravely leading his men into battle. Well, not exactly “leading”, just charging wildly into the fight, yelling his head off.

‘At first, taken by surprise, the Windsor kids had a hard time of it. They were knocked back and penned in. There was just a lot of pushing and shoving and swearing and name-calling. But the twins had the advantage of being on horseback and they used their horses to push through Tyler’s troops, and once they were out in the clear they could turn and ride along the rear of Tyler’s mob, laying into them with heavy clubs. They could easily have used their swords and that would’ve meant a quick end to Tyler and his idiots, but I guess they didn’t want to kill anyone if they didn’t have to. They had some decency.

‘The fight went on for ages. I couldn’t tell what was going on. Kids were running everywhere and there was no shape to it. All you could clearly see were the twins, riding through the mass of bodies, whacking and hacking. Their kids were better organized. They had some idea of tactics at least, and gradually the fight started to break up. One by one Tyler’s guys gave up – they were too bruised and battered – and either left the scrum and sat on the ground with their weapons at their sides or ran off. Tyler and Josa and their closest friends were still at it, though.

‘The twins had probably been hoping that Tyler wouldn’t hold out this long. In fact I bet they’d expected that he’d simply surrender when he saw he was outnumbered. But Tyler wasn’t the surrendering type. He was more of a fight-to-the-death kind of guy. And that day he got what he wanted.