Margaret Just a snack. (to Sally) You forgot the serviettes. On the kitchen table.

Sally goes off.

More tea, Richard?

Richard If you would be so kind.

Margaret David?

David Let me help you.

Richard May we include Perkins?

Margaret Of course.

Richard Just to keep him genial. (Calls.) Perkins! Tea!

Perkins Tea, Sir. Coming.

Sally returns with the serviettes.

Margaret How does he always manage to be within earshot?

Richard (whispers) Always eavesdropping.

Margaret (laughs) Richard!

Richard Obsessed with curiosity. Characteristic of all the Norfolk Fens people. Also tiny feet and remarkably large hat-size.

Margaret I think you’re secretly laughing at us all, Richard.

Richard Never!

Sally hands the serviettes to Margaret.

Margaret They’re not for me, are they? Hand them round.

Richard Deeply suspicious, too, your Fens man. But straight as a die and faithful as a Gurkha.

Christopher enters right.

Christopher Nobody so far, I’m afraid. Probably some confusion about the time.

Richard It’s now three-thirty.

Christopher We’ll give them another few minutes. Or so. Well done, Margaret. I’m parched. Thank you, Sally (serviette). I said three o’clock explicitly. Your watch is fast, Dick.

Sally Will I take a look?

Christopher If you would. Can’t imagine what can have happened.

Sally exits right. Perkins comes out of the house.

Richard Tea, Perkins?

Perkins Tea, Sir. Grateful.

Margaret Shortbread, Richard?

Richard Did you make them yourself?

Margaret This morning.

Richard Take two if I may. (to Perkins) Is your hatband twenty-four inches?

Perkins Twenty-four and a half, Sir.

Richard (to Margaret) Pure Fens.

Margaret You are laughing at us.

Richard (whispers) And look at the feet – weeny.

David Have you ever been to Kenya, Richard?

Richard Never. Why do you ask?

David Just that Mother has a distant cousin there. (to Christopher) Tristram. Tristram Brooke. We hear from him every Christmas.

Christopher Do we?

David Occasionally.

Christopher Tristram Brooke.

David The home place is in Warwickshire. Tristram lives north-east of Nairobi. In Selberawawa.

Christopher In –? You’ve just made that name up, David!

Margaret (quickly) We have sandwiches and biscuits here, too – who’s for what?

Richard Commend the shortbread. (to David) Kenya? Like to go there. Our crowd out there say it’s a delightful place. And peaceful.

Clement O’Donnell enters right. Blustery; breathless; compelled to talk when he knows he should be quiet. And now fuelled by drink. He could be a vagrant.

Clement Forgive me – I know – I know – I’m an intruder and interrupting a happy domestic assemblage, a congress of family and friends – I’m very conscious of that. And for my graceless invasion, Mr Christopher, I do offer you my most –

Christopher It’s Clement O’Donnell!

Clement It is, too. And not clad for polite company. But then I’ve known three generations of the Gore family; and The Lodge has always been a house of tolerance and grace. So I do have a confidence that my present condition will be afforded the indulgence this family has always –

Christopher (holds up a silencing hand) O’Donnell!