“You didn’t even check to see if I was okay that night,” she continued, voice barely audible. She only realized then that she was crying, too, that both of them were rooted in place by their respective sadness and resentment. “I told you I loved you, and you acted like you never even knew me.”

“I know,” he answered, breath catching in his throat as he spoke. “I know.”

At this, a heavier silence fell. In another time, it would have been the start of a long, bitter argument, one that no one ever truly won. But in this moment, in the exquisite pain and joy only they were capable of causing each other, he only offered a quiet, defeated nod.

“Listen,” he finally replied, wiping his face. He checked his watch before returning his eyes to hers. “I have to go. I’ll see you at the wedding, okay?”

At that, she nodded, and he grabbed his phone on the counter before turning to leave. She listened to the sound of him slipping on his shoes and walking to open the door. And then she counted the seconds until it quietly clicked into place behind him, only exhaling once he was gone.

23. Morningside Heights, USA

23

MORNINGSIDE HEIGHTS, USA

Before

“Alex!” Paul shouted, briefly pausing from his otherwise incessant banging. “Open the door right now, or I’m actually calling the cops.”

It had been four days since she’d last opened it. Once Dev had safely deposited her there after the party, she’d passed out in her bed fully clothed, only waking twelve hours later. It took her a while to piece together what happened, and even longer to understand that the combination of medication and alcohol in her system could have created a far worse outcome.

Since then, she’d been holed up in her studio apartment, living off of whatever already happened to be in her kitchen. She spent her days in a half-waking state of anxiety and sadness, but her nights were manic, clicking around on her computer until she’d opened dozens of tabs across four separate windows. On the stereo she’d brought from Rochester, an old opera mix looped at all times, only shifting in volume depending on the hour.