He was naked, but she couldn’t see him, not in the position they were in. She could see the cords on his neck standing out, showing all of the self-control it was taking him to hold steady now. She could see the flex of the muscles in his shoulders, his chest. The intensity in his face. The deep grooves between his eyebrows, the firm set of his lips.

She couldn’t see all of his body, but she could see him.

In a real and intimate way. In a way she had never seen him before.

And she could feel him.

The hard ridge of him pressed between her legs, against where she was throbbing for him.

It was such a foreign feeling, this deep, aching desire shared with another person.

She knew about arousal with a man in a bland way. It wasn’t that she didn’t get excited in this kind of situation. But not like this.

Not need that seemed to fill her to overflowing while hollowing her out all at the same time.

It was different, and so was he. Different as a lover, and different because he was him.

If she had been asked to imagine what it would be like to have sex with Ryder only a week ago, she would have said that it would be awkward.

That she might giggle and laugh because he was her friend, and what business did they have seeing each other naked?

But there was nothing funny about this moment. And sex for her often had a bit of lightness infused with it. But not this.

Not now.

It felt momentous and potentially altering, and normally she would have wanted to run from it. She didn’t, though, not now. Because it felt essential to who she might become as a person.

Because it felt like a reclaiming of something she hadn’t even known she needed.

To have a man look at her like this. Like he was starving for her. Like he was so hungry he might devour her completely. And maybe that was the real issue. She had never had a man look at her like this before because she had never been ready for a man like this.

She had never been ready for the commitment that was required to feel these things, to give back what needed to be given in order to create a connection like this.

Because it was so big, so intense, and there wasn’t another man on the planet that she could’ve ever trusted to hold on to these feelings. Except she could trust him. Because he was Ryder, and he was wonderful. Because he had always taken care of her. And he would even now.

He hooked his finger into the waistband of her panties and started to pull them down her legs, revealing that last secret from him, even though he had tasted her intimately last night.

She knew he hadn’t seen her. Not like this.

He let out a curse. Short and sharp, and somehow, it sounded more like a prayer.