Rebecca said, “That could have happened to anybody.” But she looked thoughtful for a moment. “Women aren’t usually physically violent. It’s pretty rare. So you think this girl was violent by nature?”

“No, not necessarily,” I said. What did I think? It was no more likely that Esme snapped than that Stefan snapped. She probably didn’t go around battering people. On the other hand, if she let someone else go to prison for her sin, her crying and wailing were all show: She had no conscience at all. “It all just seems to fit together, it makes sense. She was Belinda’s lover, and she was just like Stefan, terrified of losing her.”

Maybe, by that point, any way was better than facing the wide span of life without her. How could I know what drove Esme? How could I know how people had treated her in her life before? I’d never even spanked Stefan. I hadn’t struck a person in my life, not since I was nine and slapped my sister Phoebe for stealing my ten silver dollars from my jewelry box. What cyclone of emotion could whirl someone into such rage as evidenced by the photos in that box was beyond my ken.

“It’s an interesting hypothesis. Is this just a thought you’ve been having? Have you told anyone?” I told Becky about Pete Sunday and his promise to find Esme. While it might be a slim chance, even the detective seemed to think it was worth investigating.

I told Becky, “Either way this turns out, the guilt they brought up. I really don’t feel that way.”

“That’s good.”

“It was the drugs, just like it was the drink for Alice.”

“I’m glad that’s how you feel.” There was a reserve in the statement that snagged my defenses.

“Wait, am I missing something? You don’t think that Alzy would have frozen to death in a snowbank unless she was drunk, do you? I know Stefan wouldn’t have hit Belinda or anybody else unless he was so messed up he didn’t know what he was doing. That isn’t just me rationalizing things. The judge thought the same thing, or he would have sent Stefan away for murder.”

“I know,” she said. “But it’s not the same as with Alice.”

“Do the Hodges feel guilty, like they could have done more or something different?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” Becky said. “They’re political people. They put up a brave front. And they’re also actually brave. But Alice didn’t do anything to...anyone else. Both of these things are tragic. Tragic mistakes. But not the same.”