Eddie had chosen to drive his Porsche to the party. He had no intention of driving it home drunk, but was determined to show off his wealth. Jess had urged him to get a cab, but he’d flatly refused. She was a woman and she didn’t understand the method in a man’s madness.

With the whole family unable to fit in the Porsche, Jessica had also brought her Merc. ‘We’ll get a cab home later and pick the cars up tomorrow,’ Ed told her.

Parking on the packed field, Eddie suddenly wished he had got that cab after all. ‘Jesus wept! Look at the motors here. Look at that Roller – I wonder who that belongs to?’

‘I dunno, but the guests here are all obviously minted. Look at that green Bentley, Ed. Ain’t it a beauty?’ Ray said.

Annoyed that his motor paled into insignificance, Eddie quickly leaped out and urged Ray, Gary and Ricky to do the same. ‘Come on, Jess has just parked up and I’m gagging for a drink.’

Walking towards the gates of the house, Eddie was surprised to see a big bloke in a suit vetting people.

‘Names?’ the guy asked bluntly.

Eddie gave him his name and explained who Raymond was.

‘In you go,’ the geezer told him.

‘Eddie! Great to see you,’ Pat Murphy said, shaking his hand.

Eddie introduced his family and gratefully accepted the glasses of champagne that a waiter appeared with.

‘We’re gonna get a hot dog, Dad,’ Gary said, dragging Ricky away.

‘Mummy, can I go and see the clown?’Frankie screamed.

‘I wanna balloon. Get me a balloon,’ Joey said, tugging Jessica’s arm.

Patrick smiled at the two spoilt brats. ‘Do you want to come with me? Uncle Patrick has booked childminders to look after you and keep you amused. We’ve got games, toys, even fairground rides – safe ones, of course.’

‘Yes! Can we go Mummy, please?’ Frankie screamed.

Jessica looked at her husband for guidance. ‘I’m not sure, Ed. Shouldn’t they stay with us for a bit?’

Joey burst into tears and threw himself onto the ground. ‘I want a balloon and I want one now,’ he sobbed.

Embarrassed by his son’s behaviour, Eddie yanked him up by one arm. ‘I’ll give you more than a balloon in a minute, Joey. Stop behaving like a baby and act your fucking age.’

‘I’ll go over the play-area bit with ’em, if you want,’ Raymond offered.

‘No, you won’t. As Pat says, they’ll be fine. It’s time they were let off the harness. If we didn’t pamper them so much, they wouldn’t make a show of us in public every time we took ’em out. I’m sick of ’em whingeing and crying every time they don’t get their own way and I ain’t putting up with it no more,’ Eddie said, glaring at his wife.