Then Baba and Rudra sat under a tree and Rudra lit the chillum and passed it to Baba. After both smoked, Baba smiled and prayed for a while.

‘Many a time, self-inquiry leads to guilt and anger directed towards the individual trying to learn one’s own self. It is common to begin to dislike one’s own self when one is learning to get to know oneself a little better. It doesn’t make sense as here we are trying to remove weeds not planting seeds of discord. No matter what you have learnt of yourself, the first step is calm acceptance of one’s lot. Till one does not come to calm realization and acceptance of oneself, the journey can never really begin. No matter how much you want to change for the better. No matter how deep the desire for self-inquiry. No matter how determined to better one’s own self may be, if you do not learn to accept whatever one has learnt of oneself calmly, the journey shall not proceed ahead. You shall go about in circles. You might even begin to hate yourself and that shall in fact take you backwards. Thus, it is important to first calmly accept who one is and then with calm acceptance learn to better one self. This is most important, child. Do not flog yourself. You shall achieve only regret and remorse. First learn to accept yourself and then with acceptance begin to correct yourself. Don’t get sucked into the dark abyss of guilt but after calmly accepting yourself begin to walk forward, slowly spreading the Light within to dispel darkness. This is what usually happens with the process of self-inquiry. Guilt and anger enter and very often the entire process leads to defeat due to anger and guilt. Do you understand, my child with the daft look?’

‘Yes, Lord and Master of the chillum.’

‘So my sweet gnome, for most the process of self-inquiry starts and ends with guilt and anger and the person quits the process, feeling the climb impossible. Convinced that with so much darkness, there is no way Light shall clear the Path. This is the first folly. A very dangerous mistake which should be avoided at all cost. However horrible an individual feels he or she is, the moment you accept yourself calmly, then and only then can change begin to take place. Drop-by-drop the ocean is filled. Never ever forget this. Energy has no emotion. Like water, it takes the shape of whatever intent we imbibe it with. So you can accept calmly whatever is in store for you or you can lash out and make a greater mess of the situation. The power to evolve or destruct is in the hands of each individual. The power of free will is many times greater than the power of destiny and the very Gods themselves.’

‘So how do we go beyond the guilt and anger and complexes, Baba, as I am sure the deeper we dig within our own selves we are going to surface with lots of baggage and dirt?’