This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s Imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

Lost in a Good Book

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

Lost in a Good Book

A Penguin Book / published by arrangement with the author

Copyright © 2002 by Jasper Fforde

This book may not be reproduced in whole or part, by mimeograph or any other means, without permission. Making or distributing electronic copies of this book constitutes copyright infringement and could subject the infringer to criminal and civil liability.

For information address:

The Berkley Publishing Group, a division of Penguin Putnam Inc.,

375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014.

ISBN: 978-1-1011-5811-1

A PENGUIN BOOK®

Penguin Books first published by The Penguin Publishing Group, a member of Penguin Putnam Inc.,

375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014.

PENGUIN and the “Penguin” design are trademarks belonging to Penguin Putnam Inc.

Electronic edition: July, 2004

This Book
is dedicated to assistants everywhere.
You make it happen for them.
They couldn’t do it without you.
Your contribution is everything.

Contents

1. The Adrian Lush Show

2. The Special Operations Network

3. Cardenio Unbound

4. Five Coincidences, Seven Irma Cohens and One Confused Neanderthal

5. Vanishing Hitchhikers

4a. Five Coincidences, Seven Irma Cohens and One Confused Thursday Next

6. Family

7. White Horse, Uffington, Picnics, for the Use of

8. Mr. Stiggins and SO-1

9. The More Things Stay the Same

10. A Lack of Differences

11. Granny Next

12. At Home with My Memories

14. The Gravitube

15. Curiouser & Curiouser in Osaka

16. Interview with the Cat

17. Miss Havisham

18. The Trial of Fräulein N

19. Bargain Books

20. Yorrick Kaine

21. Les Artes Modernes de Swindon ’85

22. Travels with My Father

23. Fun with Spike

24. Performance-Related Pay, Miles Hawke & Norland Park

25. Roll Call at Jurisfiction

26. Assignment One: Bloophole Filled in Great Expectations

27. Landen and Joffy Again

28. “The Raven”

29. Rescued

30. CardenioRebound

31. Dream Topping

32. The End of Life as We Know It

33. The Dawn of Life as We Know It

34. The Well of Lost Plots

1.
The Adrian Lush Show

Sample viewing figures for major TV networks in England, September 1985

NETWORK TOAD

The Adrian Lush Show (Wednesday) (Chat show) 16,428,316

The Adrian Lush Show (Monday) (Chat show) 16,034,921

Bonzo the Wonder Hound (Canine thriller) 15,975,462

MOLETV

Name That Fruit! (Answer questions for cash prizes) 15,320,340

65 Walrus Street (Soap opera; Episode 3,352) 14,315,902

Dangerously Dysfunctional People Argue Live on TV (Chat show) 11,065,611

OWLVISION

Will Marlowe or Kit Shakespeare? (Literary quiz show) 13,591,203

One More Chance to See! (Reverse extinction show) 2,321,820

GOLIATH CABLE CHANNEL (1 TO 32)

Whose Lie Is It Anyway? (Corporate comedy quiz show) 428

Cots to Coffins: Goliath. All you'll ever need. (Docuganda) 9 (disputed)

NEANDERTHAL CABLE NETWORK 4

Powertool Club Live (Routers and power planers edition) 9,032

Jackanory Gold ( Jane Eyre edition) 7,219

WARWICK FRIDGE,
The Ratings War