Ben looked at the fold of skin at the base of Ahmed’s head and wondered if it would turn into two or three as Ahmed got older.

“You okay?” Ben asked. He felt as though he were asking an empty room.

“Ahmed?”

Ahmed set his elbows on the desktop and put his forehead on the heels of his hands.

“Come on, say something,” Ben said.

“I don’t know what to say. Don’t worry, they are not going to find any in our room.”

“Turn around. Come on, what happened?”

Ahmed slid the chair back slightly and turned his body toward Ben with his arm along the back of the chair. He glanced at Ben but then lowered his eyes again. Ben saw that he had been crying earlier and was trying not to cry now. The idea that Ahmed could cry hadn’t really ever occurred to Ben.

“What happened?”

“I will go before the Disciplinary Committee.”

“Did they say anything else?” Ben imagined the committee with the Companion open, pointing at the rules that the boys had violated.

Ahmed shook his head. “My father will know. Tommy says we will be expelled.” He looked at Ben again, this time with a supplicating face.

“I told you. See? I told you,” Ben said.

Ahmed’s face closed again, and Ben felt immensely sorry he had said this.

“So when’s the DC?” Ben said finally.

“Tomorrow night.”

Then, without looking up, Ahmed said, “Will you be my advocate?”

Ben said, “What, in the DC?” but he knew immediately that Ahmed meant this. He imagined Hutch’s face.

“You have not been breaking expectations,” Ahmed said.

Ben felt proud to be asked, and to have kept his own rule-breaking discreet, and then came a twinge at his hypocrisy. But also the relief that Ahmed wouldn’t have him at such a disadvantage. Or was this actually to be Ben’s employment, to earn back what he owed?

“Maybe I shouldn’t.”

“Would you do it if there was no money?”

Ben paused, but then nodded.

“So, please.”

Ben tried to nod again.

“You’re not sure,” said Ahmed. He seemed suddenly ready to cry. “Why do we even want to be here?”

Ben constantly held this question away.

“What are we all trying to be? My father is just as a man should be, and he never came here.”

“But you can’t go back and grow up poor in the desert.”

Ahmed nodded. “So,” Ben said. “Let’s figure out what we’re going to say in the DC.”

14. And Now

14. And Now