“Because it’s going to upset you.” Raphael pulled a battered green folder from his coat pocket. Coop blinked. It looked exactly like the one he’d stolen from the Bellicose Manor safe.

“How did you . . . ?” he said, but couldn’t get out the rest.

“What is that?” said Qaphsiel.

“The deed,” said Raphael.

“To what? The box?”

“To Earth.”

“Pardon me?” said Qaphsiel, his voice cracking a little.

“You heard me. God gave me the Earth. Well, not ‘gave it to me’ gave it to me. I won it. Since you’ve been gone, he’s developed quite a taste for Texas Hold’em. The problem is . . .” Raphael looked around conspiratorially and touched the side of his nose. “God’s got a tell.”

Qaphsiel stared. “I’ve been here for four thousand years, searching and searching, and it meant nothing?”

“Not nothing,” said Raphael. “Everyone upstairs is very impressed with your stick-to-itiveness. They’re even going to give you your old job back. Though I’m afraid after four thousand years, the office-supplies closet is a pretty big mess.”

Qaphsiel sat down on a bench against the wall. “This can’t be real. The world can’t be yours,” he said.

“I’m afraid it is. In fact, I’ve already been redecorating as I walked here. Little things at first. Then San Francisco. Soon I’ll start on Los Angeles.” Raphael shook his head. “I’m sorry, old friend, but your journey is null and void.” Raphael rolled the folder up and put it back in his pocket.

Coop tried to struggle to his feet. He put out his arm and Giselle helped him up.

“You should stay down,” she said.

“I want you to push me,” he said.

“What about the bomb?”

“There is no bomb. And if you care anything about me, push me.”

Giselle gave Coop a hard shove. He stumbled back, fell against Raphael, and slid to the ground. Raphael stared in revulsion at the blood streaked down his coat.

“You see what I’m talking about?” he said. “This is exactly the kind of thing that’s going to stop now that I’m in charge. I’m going to make this world into a new Heaven.”

“That’s ridiculous,” said Qaphsiel. “The Earth wasn’t meant to be Heaven. It’s a flawed place and meant to be so.”

“Not anymore,” said Raphael, sitting down next to the other angel. “People, animals, plants, they’re all going to straighten up now that I’m in charge. And no more of this continental drift nonsense. The continents are fine where they are.”

“You simply can’t make these arbitrary decisions,” said Qaphsiel, exasperated by the whole discussion.

“Yes, I can. I can be every bit as arbitrary as I like. It’s mine.”

“Raphael is kind of a dick,” said Sally.

“That’s being cruel to dicks,” said Giselle.

“Sorry. You like them more than I do.”

“That’s true.”