‘It’ll be sexy,’ insisted Elizabeth, ripping off his shirt and unzipping his trousers. ‘When we’re old and grey we’ll be able to look back and remember when we were young and had fantastic bodies.’

‘You think we’ll still be together then?’ he asked hopefully, thinking that his girlfriend had acquired a sudden romantic streak that had previously been missing.

‘Well, no,’ she admitted. ‘Probably not.’

He remained unconvinced but gave in to her pleading and, he had to admit, when they watched it a little later, he did find it quite arousing. The following day, Elizabeth emailed the file to Trevé, who forwarded it to a specialist editing suite, who in turn chopped it down into a neat five-minute showreel of her and Tuscany’s finest moments.

When the file was returned to her, she watched it over and over, wanting to ensure that it showed her at her most primal. Her instructions had been clear. She was happy to give viewers a glimpse of her breasts, but nothing was to be revealed between the waist and the knee, a courtesy that she did not extend to Tuscany, whose shortcomings were on display for the whole world to see.

A date was set for the leaking of the video, and several celebrity and pornographic websites were contacted in advance as official brand partners. Elizabeth would have been perfectly happy to give them the footage for free, but Trevé was clear that this was not the way these things worked. And so she accepted £2,000 from each of three sites, and on the agreed morning it was released online in sixty-minute time gaps, leading to her first tweet on the subject, which, despite its simplicity, she later discovered had taken more time to compose (23 days) than Anthony Burgess’s A Clockwork Orange (21).

@ElizCleverley Devastated that private moments of intimacy between @TuscanyFields and me have been leaked online by sick perverts. #tits #free #celebsexvideo #pleasedontlook #checkitout

This small taster allowed her followers to get a sample of what was to come and to conduct some private searches of their own now that the footage was freely available. Within an hour, she received hundreds of likes and retweets, along with supportive messages from people desperate for her to validate their existence. She waited a little longer before following up with:

@ElizCleverley Can’t get out of bed, can’t eat, can’t even pick up my phone, I feel violated. If this is the price of being a public figure, then I’d prefer to be anonymous. #freeporn #doggystyle #searchandyouwillfind

To her disappointment, this second tweet did not receive the attention of the first and, when she checked the celebrity blogs and the websites of the trashier newspapers, there was no mention of her public shaming. It was time to be a little more explicit:

@ElizCleverley The sick people at daughtersofcelebs.com, privatesexvidz.com and bbcslutz.com should be ashamed of themselves. They’ve destroyed my life by posting a private, intimate video of @TuscanyFields and me on their websites. Shameful. #watchforyourself #completelyfree