‘I think it’s called de-platforming.’

‘I’m sorry, but that’s not a real word so I won’t entertain it.’

‘Then you’re not Woke.’

‘I’ll have you know, I was Woke when everyone else was still napping.’

‘You do have a good track record on this, it’s true,’ admitted Jeremy. ‘Didn’t you name one of your sons after Lech Wałęsa?’

‘No, Nelson Mandela.’

‘Oh yes. Very Woke.’

‘And I named the other one after a Greek homosexual.’

‘Even Woker.’

‘Of course, I left Beverley to choose our daughter’s name.’

‘Ah,’ said Jeremy. ‘Well, that’s not Woke.’

‘Why not?’

‘The man choosing the sons’ names but leaving the girl to the mother? That’s not Woke at all.’

‘Well, all I remember is that I was awake every night with that girl when she was a baby,’ he said. ‘The boys weren’t much trouble, but Elizabeth screamed the house down for about a year. In that regard, she hasn’t changed much. She named her after Elizabeth Taylor, you know.’

‘Wonderful actress.’

‘No, the writer.’

‘Well, who’s to say?’

‘Beverley is. She insists upon it. But anyway, getting back to Aidan—’

‘Nadia.’

‘Yes, Nadia. When did this all happen?’

‘It’s been in the pipeline for quite some time now, as far as I can tell. But Nadia herself only started coming into work a few weeks ago. Aidan left on a Friday at five o’clock as usual and Nadia turned up the following Monday shortly before nine with a look on her face that said, One word and I’ll have HR down on you like a ton of bricks. Still, she seems happy with her decision, so good for her. No, not her decision, her choice. No, hang on, I don’t think I can say that either, can I? It wasn’t a choice. Her authentic self, that’s what I mean. She seems happy with her authentic self.’

‘Can one even say happy? Or self? Or with?’

‘Probably not.’

‘Can one use recognizable words at all or even speak in syntactically correct sentences?’

‘It’s risky.’

‘Well, good luck to her, I say,’ said George with a shrug. ‘Whatever gets you through the day is fine by me. But I don’t see why she couldn’t have just told me that when I was out there rather than making me think that Aidan never existed. For a man my age, it suggests early onset Alzheimer’s. How was I to know?’

‘You weren’t.’

‘As it happens, I’m on her side. Or, to be more honest about it, I couldn’t care less what she does or how she presents herself. I have enough problems in my own life without dealing with hers too. But why not just say, Actually, Mr Cleverley, you knew me as Aidan over the last few years, but I’ve realized that’s not the identity for me, and I’d appreciate it if you would call me Nadia from now on. Would that be so difficult? It just feels to me like she wants to be able to tell people that I didn’t acknowledge her existence.’