His voice was deeper, more pronounced. More his own, perhaps, now that he wasn’t just parroting Andy. She knew his appearance was different, too, but she couldn’t look at him straight. Couldn’t help wondering what he was noticing about her, how changed she was, how bedraggled from a night in hospital.

She pulled back her shoulders. There was no way she’d let him see her break down.

“Let’s go inside.” She nodded toward her flat. Maybe she’d feel more in control on her own turf. She had to admit she was relieved when her mum followed them in.

It was as strange as she’d thought it would be, having Robin among her things. All the photos of her and Zeb from their years without him. The boxes of stock that made her life look as if it was in some kind of chaotic transition. Gilbert was awake and seemed to be rearranging his nest, a flurry of industrious noises coming from the cupboard. Emma urged everybody into the kitchen. Zeb sat between his parents—for the first time ever—while Julie busied herself making tea.

Everything about the situation felt wrong, wrong, wrong. This was a conventional family setup, but not for them. Not for their family.

Zeb stared at the table. “I’ve fucked up.”

“Tell us, mate,” Robin said, and Emma squeezed her fists, trying not to succumb to the rage she felt, hearing him address her son like that. Watching him parent.

This is about Zeb now, she told herself, pinning her eyes on her son’s face.

“The night Freya and I got drunk in the park,” Zeb said. “You were right, Mum, it wasn’t the only time. We bonded that night because we were both pissed off with life. After that we started sneaking out, just to talk, drink . . . It was good for me at first. I didn’t want to tell you because it was my thing, my way of dealing with how I was feeling.” He glanced at Robin, then back to Emma, then down again.

“I would buy the booze and bring the music, she’d lend me books. Sometimes we’d just listen to podcasts, trying to relax. But sometimes she’d be angry or upset, and sometimes I would be. She told me her mum was having an affair and she was planning to get proof. But she also . . .” He paused and coughed into his sleeve. “Well, she kind of recruited me.”

“How do you mean?” Emma asked in alarm.