Ronny shrugged. “Maybe.”

“You got a critique of her, too?”

“No, I liked Kathy. We could talk.”

“I know.”

“She’s probably still around.”

“No, I think I fucked that up too bad. What are you doing trying to marry me off, anyway?”

“I’m just talking. It doesn’t make me jealous at the moment.”

“That’s because neither one of them is here now.”

“Yeah. I know. Sorry.”

Ben butted his head gently. “They’d be the ones jealous right now, you know. Little bitch boy.”

“Yeah. Scoot up a minute.”

“Okay. That’s good.” Ben settled onto him again. “Why don’t you like gay guys?”

Ronny was lying on his back now, inside Ben’s arm. Ben’s other arm was crooked behind his head and he sprawled one heavy leg onto Ronny, who said, “I was hoping you’d forget I said that.”

“I didn’t. There’s something really fucked up about it.”

Why was it so easy to talk tonight? If he stopped to think about it he would lose the feeling, so he took a breath. “It’s just something I need to work on. Like I said.”

They lay there listening to the clock ticking, a car passing on the street, lights splashed against the wall. Ben said, “I had to know you were not really a sissy before I could think anything about you.”

“Yeah? But I am a sissy.”

“When I called you a faggot and you blew me that kiss. I don’t know, maybe it was the way you did it. You cracked me up. You always crack me up.” There were sounds from the house, the toilet flushing, someone’s door closing. “You think your roommates will rat us out if they hear us?”

“I don’t know these guys yet. Jamal won’t. I don’t think.”

“I need to come over here and meet this Miss Dee lady, and work on her.”

“You going to charm her?”

“Don’t laugh. I bet she loves football players. Ask her. I’ll bet you the price of the phone.”

“I ought to take you up on that but I know I’d lose.”

“Pussy.”

“Look at you, babe. You’re solid charm head to toe, when you can remember not to spit.”

Ben chuckled. “My mom’s going to love you, saying that kind of crap.”

“I might not say it in front of her.”

“Oh, please. You can’t keep your mouth shut.”

“I can for a while.”

“Yeah. But once you get started.”

“How long do her treatments last? Another month?”

“They don’t even know if the tumor’s going down yet. She finds that out next week. She gets a break after three more weeks from the chemo stuff but she may have to do more.”

“Maybe that’s when I should go, when she’s on a break.”

“What if she wants you to come earlier?”

“Would she?”

Ben shrugged. “I think maybe she knows something’s going on. I don’t know. I get the feeling.”

“Us?”

He nodded. “She hasn’t said anything. She asks about you but it’s not like she’s asking about a friend of mine. She wants me to know she thinks something different about you. At first I thought it was because I told her you were smart and I could talk to you. She’s about the only other person I was ever able to talk to. But now it’s like that and something else, too, and I don’t know what, so don’t ask.”