“And is that rare, Jackson?”

“But I had to keep—”

Chef JJ put her bony hand up like a stop sign, and Jackson’s face went the color his beef should have been.

“Oh, Jackson,” Dieter said. “You did a mistake. Do you know what was it?”

Zoe’s hand shot in the air. “Ooo, I know! I know!”

“‘Made a mistake.’ ‘Made a mistake,’” Chef JJ snapped. “Not ‘did a mistake.’ How many times do I have to tell you?”

“What was Jackson’s mistake?” I asked Zoe when the show broke for ads.

“He thought rare was here.” She pressed her middle finger and the tip of her thumb together.

In case you get to watch something other than cooking shows, Zoe was talking about the finger test. The finger test is how you tell meat doneness just by feeling it. Rare meat should feel like the gushy part of your palm when you’re making the okay sign. You could just cut into the meat or use a meat thermometer, but that’s rookie and would never fly on Can You Cut It?

At the end of the commercial break, there was a clip of Chef JJ in front of the Food Connection building in Manhattan talking directly to the camera. “Want to know if you can cut it? Come find out. We’re looking for chefs ages eight to fourteen for next season. Go to canyoucutit.com for details on sending an audition video.”

“I could cut it,” Zoe said.

“You so could, but you’re going to have to wait a couple years.” Zoe versus Chef JJ would be like the World Cup of Can You Cut It?

“And I’d wear a shirt for The Doughnut Stop just like Gus did for The Empanada Factory.” Gus won last season and he plugged his parents’ empanada chain every chance he got.

I kicked off my shoes and settled back to watch the rest of the show.

“Uch!” I jerked my hand back from the seat cushion. There was a brown smear across it and a matching one on the sofa.

“Zoe!” I showed her my hand.

“Sorry, Henry’s potty training. Don’t worry. I put him in time out.”

“But you left his poop on the couch?”

“I’ll clean it later.”

“Clean it now.” I shoved her off the couch with my clean hand.

“But—”

“Go! Or I’ll tell Mom Henry was on the couch.”

“Like you never had an accident,” she yelled as she ran out of the room.

When I came back from washing my hands, Lily was on the screen talking about what she’d do with the $100,000 prize money if she won. She had a fancy houseboat picked out already, and she was telling Chef JJ all about it, but I wasn’t paying attention anymore. I was thinking, if I had all that money, could I solve our doughnut supply problem?

I’d still have to go to school. There’s a lot you can do with $100,000, but you can’t add hours to the day or change the law requiring kids to go to school.