When Aubrey didn’t respond right away, Tara realized how nonsensical her question was. It was because of her. He left because he couldn’t stand being near her anymore. Did he hate her for her cruel words?

AUBREY: I thought I should let you know. You okay?

TARA: Thanks. Yes, I’m fine.

That was such a lie. She should take it back. She didn’t want to ruin her relationship with Aubrey, too, by being dishonest with her.

TARA: I lied. I’m not fine at all.

With that confession, she ran to the bathroom and hurled in the toilet. Shivering and her teeth chattering, Tara sat on the cold floor for a moment to gather herself. Seth was gone. Really gone … It was worse. So much worse than what she’d imagined it would be like. She knew she would be heartbroken when he left, but she’d opened herself to him anyway. She’d thought being with him was worth the heartache. She was right on that count. She wouldn’t trade the time she’d spent with Seth for the world, but damn it hurt.

When her butt started feeling numb from the cold, she pushed off the ground on shaking limbs and brushed her teeth. Her phone dinged.

AUBREY: Let me know if you want to talk. I’m here for you.

While she appreciated her friend’s unwavering support, she needed to pull herself together first. The only sound that would escape her mouth if she opened it now would be sobs and wails.

Wait. A. Minute.

Why would Aubrey text her to tell her that Seth had left? Why would she ask if she was okay? Oh, shit. She knew. Aubrey knew that she’d had a thing with her brother-in-law and then stomped on his heart with construction-grade boots. Seth must’ve told Landon about them. Of course, he would. Who else would he lean on?

When she tried to keep it locked up inside, she nearly broke. She was so relieved that Seth had Landon and Aubrey for support. Well, not so much anymore. He’d left for Paris. Where he had no one. Would he be all right?

The tightness at the back of the throat told her she was on the verge of crying again, but she stopped herself. Crying was self-indulgence at this point. She’d broken Seth’s heart in the harshest way possible and was trying to soothe her guilt and pain with tears. But she didn’t deserve to have her guilt and pain soothed away. She let the full force of her pain wash over her, and she buckled under its weight. But she wouldn’t turn away from it anymore. The least she could do was hurt with Seth.

The wallowing stopped now. She was a grown woman with responsibilities. She had to continue to function.

Pain was her constant companion now, but she’d learned how to function through it. And so she existed—day by agonizing day. She worked hard at the brewery and offered to help anybody, any way she could. She might as well do some good with her existence. Like putting in more hours at the brewery.