She felt a little bad about that too. Philip had testified that Nate had drunkenly waved a gun at him. Oksana knew from living through battles that there were only two acceptable responses when a firearm was aimed at your chest: raise your arms and hope for the best or fight like hell to kill the other guy before he got you. The chef had been a marine. He was never going to choose the first option.

Oksana put the paper on her bedside table and stood from the chair. Sunlight poured through her window, advertising the ninety-degree temperatures melting new parts of the pavement. Kids were biking down the street in tank tops, letting their full faces tan. She thought of the chef’s wife and his children. Did that woman wish she’d let him choke on the peanut oil? Oksana wondered. Was Imani regretting having directed the paramedics to where he’d fallen or pointing them to his EpiPen in the kitchen?

Now Philip’s wife would have to deal with the fact that he still existed—but in prison. Even if by some miracle the man got off on self-defense for Nate’s murder, he would still serve time for kidnapping the guy’s wife and attempting to kill both her and the waitress. From the coverage, Oksana was guessing he’d serve at least twenty years. Perhaps more.

If it were her, she’d have left him to die. But the chef’s wife had been a therapist. Probably, she was the forgiving type. The kind of person who would rationalize and make excuses, who’d avoid confronting who she’d really married.

Oksana chuckled to herself. People incapable of deep darkness didn’t recognize it in others. They were like deer befriending wolves, unable to spot the difference in the teeth. Fortunately, she didn’t have that problem. Life had taught her exactly where to look.

Acknowledgments

I chose to include the present pandemic as the backdrop of this book because I think it is forever intertwined with our future. Even after the worst passes, going through this time will have fundamentally changed the calculus about what is important for many of us. COVID-19 has forced a reevaluation of our responsibilities to ourselves, our families, and one another. It has required a reckoning about what support systems societies require and what jobs are grossly undervalued. For some of us, it has heightened our appreciation for family and friendships. For others, it has crystallized how compatible, or incompatible, we are with those closest to us.