Having made up his mind. He turned away from her, and continued to pack. The message was loud and clear. He had tasted, was tempted and had dismissed her.

Expecting to hear a weepy apology or a pleading tone, he was surprised to hear her chuckle. He turned to face the fiery woman, who looked him in the eye and with each passing second, he feared his resolve dissolved into a wisp of smoke as his desire for her raged and pounded in his head.

‘Rani Maa is planning to meet your rival Deependra Kumar. He is going to form his own commune. All her followers will go there blindly. Keep her happy or this is over…’

She adjusted her sari provocatively, making sure he understood what he passed by. With her head held high, heart hammering, unsure whether this would fall the way she wanted Rajjo walked out.

Mehtaab just stood there, turned to stone.

Rani Maa’s impending treachery left him dumbfounded.

Chhoti Maa Durga was here to stay.

October 1993

With the warm sun in the cold October afternoon soothing her back, Rajjo sat in the courtyard feeding the pigeons. It was therapeutic to see the birds move about pecking at the grain of wheat, without a thought, a care, or a worry. Could she be like them? These pigeons? Her reverie was broken as she heard noises. They were hushed immediately after an outburst. Her deafened ear screamed, it was Rani Maa and Mehtaab sparring. She stared at the poster cutout of a smiling Rani Maa, blessing the world while she could hear her anguish.

It seemed many a moon passed by in a span of just over a month. A lot had happened in Rajjo’s life. Sukhmani was sent away, Rajjo was the new Chhoti Maa, Mehtaab lusted after her and Rajjo was prudent enough to tease and stay away. However, she could not scuttle any longer, she would have to give herself to him, for he was going to claim his pound of flesh. Mehtaab was staying at the ashram, and Rani Maa and him were constantly fighting. Rani Maa’s mood swings were intensifying. Rajjo suspected menopause was the reason.

That evening a car arrived and took Rani Maa away. Mehtaab stayed on in the ashram, albeit in a bad mood. The time was here, and she prepared herself through the day. In the evening she was called in to serve the meal and have a chat. Raahat waited for Rajjo to come to the ledge, but Rajjo did not leave the room till the early hours of the morning.

She had spent every night with Mehtaab since then, slinking out just before dawn to avoid the eyes on the compound. However, she made sure she had a shower before she slept and she spared a thought for her Harsh Vardhan. She was sure in her belief that she was in love with a figment of her imagination, and that was the only thing holding her together.