“I don’t.”

My hands started to tremble, so I folded them between my knees. “I have no idea how to rule a kingdom, but I know that can be learned. You said so. Your mother said so. I don’t know if I’m ready for that, or if I would ultimately make a good Queen, but I want to make things better for the people in Solis and in Atlantia. I keep thinking about how the Ascended need to be stopped. I know that needs to happen, and that has to mean something, right? And I have to believe that being able to possibly prevent war is worth figuring that out. People’s lives are worth that, including my brother’s. You’d be by my side. We’d rule together, and we’d have your parents to help us.” And maybe I would come to love Atlantia as deeply as he and his parents did. It already felt like home to me, so it was possible. But there was also a little guilt. I wanted his mother to approve of why I decided to take the Crown. I swallowed, but a knot remained in my throat. “That is if you want this. If you can be happy with this. I don’t want you to feel forced into it,” I said as he took a quiet step toward me. “I know you said that part of you knew it would happen eventually, but I want you to know for sure that this is what you want and not…not do it just because I’m choosing this,” I finished, watching him and waiting for a response. When he stopped before me, saying nothing, the knot expanded in my throat. “Are you going to say something?”

Casteel knelt in front of me, resting a knee in the sand. “I told you before that if you wanted the Crown, I would support it. I would be right there with you. That hasn’t changed.”

“But what do you want?” I insisted.

He placed his hands on my knees. “This isn’t about me or what I want.”

“Bullshit,” I exclaimed.

Casteel laughed. “I’m sorry.” He dipped his chin, grinning. “You’re just adorable when you curse.”

“That’s weird, but whatever. It’s not just about me.”

“It’s about you because I know what ruling a kingdom entails. I grew up with a Queen as a mother and a King as a father. I also grew up knowing that I could ascend to the throne.” Golden eyes met mine. “Even though I’ve held off assuming the role, it wasn’t because I didn’t want to be King.”

“I know,” I said quietly. “It was because of your brother.”

“I know I can do this. I know you can. But it’s not such a shock to me.” Casteel worked his fingers between my knees, releasing my hands. He held them loosely in his. “I want to protect my people and the kingdom, and if sitting on that throne will do that, then it’s what I want. But,” he stressed, “I want you to have the choice—the freedom. I also want you to know that you don’t have to justify or explain your reasons for taking the Crown. Not to me. Not to my mother. And there is no one right reason, as long as it is your choice. So,” he said, running his thumbs over my knuckles, “is it your choice to take the Crown?”