She inclined her head, nodding. I had no idea if that meant she believed me. Her internal pain overshadowed anything else she may be feeling. Several moments passed. “Do you think Malik lives?”

“Casteel believes that he does.”

Her gaze sharpened on me. “I asked if you believe Malik lives. Not if my son believes it.”

I stiffened, glancing through the garden to where Kieran stood with his back to us. “He…he has to be alive. Not because I want him to be alive for Casteel and for your family’s sake, but how else would my brother have Ascended? We’re not entirely sure that they have another Atlantian held captive,” I said, thinking of the unnamed and faceless woman who could possibly be my birth mother. “And Duchess Teerman claimed that Malik was. She wasn’t the most trustworthy of sources, but I think she spoke the truth. I just don’t…”

“What?” she prodded when I fell silent, sensing a small measure of hope from her.

“I just don’t know what kind of…state he will be in.” I twisted my fingers together in my lap, bracing myself for the raw wave of pain that came from her. Tears pricked my eyes as I glanced at her. Her lips trembled as she pressed them together. “I’m sorry. I can’t imagine how you feel. Knowing that they turned my brother and possibly my dearest friend is hard enough. But this is different. I’m so sorry.”

She breathed as if the air were full of shards of glass. “If he is alive and they’ve had him this long?” Her gaze touched mine and then flicked to the sky. “It would almost be better if he…”

She didn’t finish her sentence, but she didn’t need to. “If he were dead?”

Her shoulders jerked as she blinked rapidly. “That is a terrible thing to think, isn’t it?” She pressed a hand to her chest as she swallowed several times. “Especially as a mother, it’s a terrible thing to wish for your child.”

“No. It’s just…real,” I said, and her eyes flew to mine. “Feeling that way doesn’t mean you don’t love or care for him or even hope that he’s not still alive.”

“How can you say that when you know that a part of me wishes he had passed on to the Vale?”

“You know that I can sense emotions,” I stated, and tension bracketed her mouth. “I can feel your anguish, but I also felt your hope and your love for your son. I know that’s real,” I repeated, searching her gaze. “And I think wishing that any loved one was at peace isn’t wrong. I love my brother. What I may have to do doesn’t change that.”

“No,” she agreed softly. “It just proves how much you do love him.”

I nodded. “The same goes for you and Malik.”

She stared at me for several seconds and then a small, trembling smile appeared. “Thank you,” she whispered, reaching between us and patting my arm. “Thank you.”