“Fine.” I take the shot, coughing and hissing. “But only for you, because I love you and this sucks. God I hate tequila.”

“It’s the glorious juice of forgetting.”

“It’s the glorious juice of getting arrested for reckless behavior, public intoxication, and public urination.”

She flips me off. “That was one time, bitch, one time.”

“What’s the warpath, though? Because I’m not following.”

“I’m gonna sow my wild oats, Nads. Yvette comes home for major holidays at most, and now I’m single again, so I’m gonna go out and get all cougar on Hotlanta.”

“No one here calls it that.”

“I know. I was being funny.”

“Well. Use a condom and take Ubers. Last thing you need is a DUI and an unexpected pregnancy.”

She waves a hand. “Psshh. I’m perimenopausal already, so that’s not an issue. Uber is magical, though.”

“You’re only just barely over forty.” I frown. “And I don’t think being perimenopausal means you’re no longer fertile. You have to be through it all the way.”

“I’m forty-two, and my mom was menopausal by forty-five. And I’ll be careful.” She points at me with her spoon. “You’re next, so pay attention.”

“Am not. I’m thirty-nine, so I’m a baby compared to you. I’ve got years to go, still.” I hate my next words even as they emerge. “Fat lot of good they’ll do me.”

She pours me another shot—it tastes funny, with the residue of the wine mixed in. “Nothing, still?”

I shake my head. “Nope. I’m fertile Myrtle, according to tests, but he’s not.”

“Shooting blanks?”

I nod. “Seems that way.”

“What about—”

“Tried it, twice. Didn’t take. Haven’t had the courage to try again.” I twist my wedding band. “Plus, he’s…I don’t know.”

She slowly sets the bottle down. “He’s what?”

“Lying about something. Or, hiding something, rather.”

“How do you know?”

“He told me.”

She laughs in disbelief. “He told you he’s hiding something?”

“Yeah.”

“But not what?”

I shake my head, tears stinging my eyes, words now clogged in my throat.

“He’s not cheating is he?” She sounds like she finds that as hard to believe as I do.

“No.” It’s barely a word, more of a hissed sound.

She huffs. “Yeah, I can’t believe that of Adrian. No man has ever loved a woman the way Adrian loves you.” A shake of her head. “So that being true, what could he be hiding?”

I shake my head and shrug, fighting sobs. “I…” One escapes, a low ragged one. “I’m scared, Tess. Really, really scared.”

“Like, you think he’s sick or something? And trying to hide it to protect you or some macho bullshit like that?”

I nod. “He’s losing weight. I think he’s secretly throwing up. I think his research trips aren’t all…just research.”