“Well, good. I’m glad you agree.”

“Because apart from anything else,” said Finn, infuriatingly cheerful, “going through the courts will take months and months. Maybe years. Remember Dale Farm? And we won’t be here anything like that long. We’ll be gone by midwinter night.”

Moonstruck hippies, Donald thought.

“Also,” Finn continued, “it’ll cost a fortune, and take up hours of your time, and make everyone sad and angry. And the end result will be the same whatever you do. We’ll be here for a few months, then we’ll be gone. I’ll clean up, there won’t be anything left behind. So you might as well save yourself the hassle and just put up with us for a bit.”

“You actually think you can live in a small wooden hut? Right through the autumn gales? Getting cut off at every high tide? With no running water or sewerage?” Donald snorted. “Do you have any idea how cold it gets down here?”

“The wind won’t be a problem because we’re in the lee of two big dunes,” said Finn, “and we’ve got a heater, and plenty of warm clothes. We have a chemical toilet with bamboo screens, which we’ll be emptying at the campsite and taking with us when we go. And a mate of mine built me a portable shower from a garden hose. You can have a go on it if you like. But thank you for thinking of us.”

“If I have to come back with someone from the council, I will,” said Donald. “Just so you know.”

“Fair enough,” said Finn. “It’s a free country. If you want to waste your time, I can’t stop you.”

“Look, mate,” Donald continued doggedly, “however much you want to think this is okay, you are actually breaking the law. You need to take this seriously.”

“I am taking this seriously,” said Finn. “I’m taking it very seriously indeed. I’m just not worried. I’ve done my research, and I know how long it’ll take you to evict us. Time’s on our side.”

“Finn,” said Ava, frowning.

Finn gave her a quick, secret smile and a wink.

“And how about you?” Donald asked Ava. (Her travel plans meant she must have money. She couldn’t want to live in a one-room shack with autumn coming on.) “Do you want to be dragged through the courts and hassled by the locals? Just because your brother’s an idiot doesn’t mean you have to be.”

He saw instantly this had touched a nerve. When she looked at him she was channelling that secret female power that made grown men feel like naughty little boys. Ellen used to be able to do it too. Any threat to Alicia and she would transform into an angry Goddess –

“I’d back off if I were you,” said Finn to Donald. “Don’t anger the Gods and all that.”

“By the way,” said Donald, maddened by this unwelcome sympathy between them, “that camper van of yours. It’s been in the car park for a week. Didn’t you know there’s no overnight camping allowed?”