I wished I had no body because then I wouldn’t have so easily revealed my fear. There was no way to lie to him. So I had to find a different way.

“I know where we can get our hands on some money,” I said. Both men turned their faces toward me.

Dice said, “Say more.”

“In Durham,” I said. “It’s something we could sell.” Dice began to pace up and down by the feeder trough. He looked underweight. His legs, in particular, were textured with veins.

For a moment, I let myself imagine going home. If my mother had really forgiven me, I could tell her I was happy with the family, I could explain myself and at last be seen and understood.

“In my mother’s house,” I said. “In a cookie tin. She has two diamond earrings. She works all day, so we could just sneak in and out.” I paused. How could I be sure she’d be working? But she was always working. “I could distract her at work.” The sad rising sunlight pulsed on the floor like it was sending me a signal.

“Real diamonds?” Dice said. He had stepped quite close to me. He was smiling placidly but his eyes were tense.

“Part of a set,” I said.

Dice kept his eyes on mine. Even now, I loved his attention. I’d loved it since I arrived.

“And where does she live, Harmony?” Dice said gently.

I paused. I imagined seeing once again her beige house with its bright green lawn where once the magnolia had stood. I imagined Bay and Dice arriving and finding her unexpectedly at home. What would she think of these strong dirty people? She’d fear for her life. “Don’t you think I should go along?”

“If you tell me how to find these diamonds,” Dice said, “and we go, and we find them, you can come out with us on an action. You can be a part of all that we do. You can help nature fight back, really fight.” I pictured Osha and Cuke, their waxy horrible skin. But I wanted to be fearless and reach the marrow of life. “We’ll forgive your indiscretion.” He took the camera from Bay’s hand. Out of his pocket, he withdrew the pig flashlight. My heart was in my throat.

Bay said, “There’s so much more to know, Harmony.”

I made the decision then, but it only seemed like a decision afterward. I was like the woman who hands her pocketbook to the man who never intended to rob her, or the man who dies under his bed when the funnel cloud never touches down; I’d been preparing and waiting so long that I could no longer see that I had made a decision.