I had to laugh, recalling that old treat. And yet, at the same time, I flashed on the more terrifying image of Lieutenant rll, “vamping” me with her cleavage while preparing to drain me with those garish, deadly teeth.

Suddenly, I remembered. The theme song from that movie, a variation on their regular ballad – Thanks for the Memories. The variant on that old stand-by was one of the reasons that Road To Transylvania got banned, left unfinished, and hidden away, never to be seen till humanity reached another stage.

I cleared my throat… then started humming—

—and the sonic cord responded! First rippling nearby and then vibrating along its length, reacting to this particular melody by resonating evermore in sync, in rhythm, gradually unleashing its pent-up energy. It took some concentration not to let all this shake my singing off-beat. But I managed to keep up the tempo.

“Taaaa ta-dee ta-dee dum…”

Wave-fringes criss-crossed, interfering and reinforcing… until a stable bulge formed, right behind me…

…a bulge that began pushing me forward, almost as if it were alive, like some compliant sea creature.

Gradually, but smoothly and without a hiccup, I began a long, steady glide into the night.

All right!

Only the pace stayed much too slow, no matter how loudly or forcefully I hummed or la-de-dah’d the old melody. Evidently, the greedy cable wanted more.

So I added words, the ones that Crosby and Hope sang to the lovely and well-favored Lamour, on the parapet of that gloomy, Carpathian castle. A crooning lament of fond – if kinky – recollection.

“Fangs… for the mammaries…”

I cannot say for sure that I remembered them all correctly. The lyrics. It was, after all, an off-color and low-brow little ditty about three bosom buddies, trying to transcend dental jeopardies. But if I faked some stanzas, the finicky cable didn’t seem to mind. Thrumming like a happy banjo string, it responded by launching me ever-faster across a dark cityscape, accelerating over the rooftops of a frightened populace who must have heard my poor ululation and doubtless thought me yet another terrifying predator. Another singing monster who they hoped would pass them by.

Sleep tight, I thought, while crooning and zooming under the stars, toward where I knew not. It’s only me, an Ancient One, but as mortal as you are.

And yet, I knew better. For history teaches a lesson, known by every other species on Old Earth, and then beyond.

Beware angering humans. Even those who are patient and grown up.

Especially that kind.

My destination loomed ahead. Something dark that squatted, big and formidable on the horizon, in front of a bright nebula. It would almost certainly be someplace desperately dangerous, and perhaps this just proved what a sucker I was, heading straight toward it.