“Is it worth it?” I ask.

“Why, you thinking of signing on?”

My lips twist, as does an invisible dagger in my gut. It’s an innocent-enough joke, but there’s weight behind it. With rescue ships inbound, my days on the Minnow are numbered, no matter what happens when they catch up. As much as I hate to admit it—which isn’t very much, I’m finding—this ship’s become home in the past few months.

Swift snorts, folding her arms against the chill sea winds. “It’s never going to end,” she groans. “That’s the worst bit. I … I dunno, when I signed on to this crew, I thought it’d be over someday, or at least I’d be the one calling the shots in the end. Y’know, I was a kid. I thought I could change, I thought I could get out. I thought I wouldn’t end up like … ” There’s something breaking inside her, something that’s pushing her close to tears, but she bites down on them, ducking her head to keep me from seeing. “I’m trapped.”

“Yeah, me too,” I tell her, and her watery gaze snaps up, her bright blue eyes fixed on mine. “I mean … I used to want more than anything to get off this ship, to go home, to do some good in the world. But after … yesterday, after what I’ve done—” I break off, trying to collect my thoughts. “I’ve spent my whole life fighting pirates. It’s in my blood. It’s what I do. And then three months on this boat and I’m just one of them.”

“Am I ‘just one of them’?” Swift asks, miffed.

“No. You’re so much more.” The traitorous truth slips from my lips far too quickly for me to rescind it. I can feel a blush building in my cheeks, and from the stunned look on Swift’s face, the darkness is doing nothing to conceal it. “I mean—”

“Oh, shit.”

“If it weren’t for … everything … ”

She buries her face in her hands, her shoulders shaking with laughter.

“Quit it,” I yelp, swatting her on the shoulder. “It’s not funny.”

“It really isn’t,” Swift says, but she’s giggling still, and I can’t help but laugh with her. It’s ridiculous. It’s outrageous. Bao could tap dance across the NeoPacific right now and it wouldn’t seem that out of place, because I’m in way over my head and I’m falling.