‘Yes, we’ve bonded over your being the star of social media and CCTV for the past weeks, Violette.’

Her eyes narrowed even more.

‘How’s Eddie taking everything?’ he asked, reminding himself that he was the adult here.

‘Did you see the graffiti on the news?’ she asked. ‘Someone wrote Eddie Bin Lardin lives hear on his cottage wall. Can’t even spell. Frickin’ dumb people give me the shits.’

‘Same,’ Bee said.

Bish nodded. Same.

‘So where are they?’ he asked, as Bee put money on the table and stood up. ‘How the hell did you get Fionn into a car?’

Sighing from his companions, as if Bish were an idiot for asking so many questions.

A long car horn sounded loudly from the road.

‘In that,’ Violette said.

‘What?’ He turned to look.

‘We got him out of hospital in that.’ She was pointing to the Salvation Army twelve-seater with wheelchair access that had just pulled up. Lola, Manoshi, Fionn and Eddie waved ecstatically from the backseats.

Bish stumbled to his feet. Bee and Violette followed him to the van, where Charlie Crombie poked his head out of the driver’s window. ‘He’s not driving.’

That was how Bish found himself riding shotgun to Charlie Crombie on the road to Yorkshire with a carload of kids who should have been in school or in hospital. The upside was that the fathers of Lola and Manoshi finally found something to unite them: their desire to have Bish arrested on a string of charges. Katherine and Sadia were only slightly more forgiving.

‘Have you lost your mind, Bish?’ Katherine asked when Lola passed him her phone. ‘Ian’s called the police. You do know that?’

‘They are sick children,’ Sadia said. He could tell he was on speaker phone.

‘I think they’re sick of being sick children,’ he said. ‘And they were heading north regardless of whether I came with them or not. Would you rather I’d let them go on their own?’

‘I’m calling your mother,’ Sadia said.

Bish rang Grazier and waited for the swearfest to end before he spoke. ‘You’re a heart attack waiting to happen, Grazier.’ Now he was reduced to channelling Sarraf.

‘Turn the bus around and bring them back,’ Grazier ordered.

‘I don’t have access to the keys. Charlie won’t relinquish them for the time being.’

Charlie shot him a look that said he was never going to relinquish them.

‘I’ll have the kids back at the hospital tonight,’ Bish said. ‘Meanwhile keep the media away from this. Call off whatever police Ian Parker’s got on board. No roadblocks. No car chase.’

‘I’m up for a car chase,’ Charlie said.

Grazier swore again. ‘Where are you heading?’

Bish didn’t quite lie, just left out some of the truth. ‘Fionn needs to see his mother. I’ll ring you when we get there.’

‘No, you’ll see me when you get there,’ Grazier said. ‘And judging by the phone call I just had from Ian Parker, you’ll be seeing them as well.’