gxh3 Rxh3

Bg3 O-O-O

I could not say that I was surprised by her castling, but the move always took me in some way to another place. That two pieces could move at once seemed like magic to me, enough so that I wished I could make a similar move in real life. What such a thing would look like I had no idea. “Very clever, Madame Nenarokov.”

“Where is Mom?”

“Teaching.”

“Right.”

e4 e5

Outside, it looked as if it might actually rain, but we knew it wouldn’t.

“What happens when you miss class like you did today?” Sarah asked.

“Sometimes I make it up, but that’s hard. Usually I simply extend my office hours so the students can come see me if they want. It’s only a big deal if a teacher makes a habit of not showing up.”

“Oh.”

“You know, sometimes people just get sick.” I was sorry as soon as I said it, but nothing registered in her face.

“Grace Tilly got a smartphone,” Sarah said.

“Really? What will Grace Tilly do with a smartphone?”

“Call people. Look up stuff.”

“Do your other friends have phones?” I asked.

“Not yet.”

“Then who is she going to call?”

“So, no smartphone.”

“I’ll talk to your mother.”

d5 Qd6

Qa4

The most heartsickening part was that I had come to recognize the bare, vacant expression before it had fully settled on Sarah’s face. This time her eyelids fluttered. Her breathing became alarmingly shallow. She convulsed once and then came back to me as quickly as she had slipped away. Seconds. Her focus became what it had been.

When Sarah was just months old, she would scare me nightly. She performed a sort of stopgap breathing that left one wondering when and if the next breath would come. I would fall out of bed and stand over her until it did, and then she would breathe on as if all was right with the world. No one ever warned us about these sounds. I felt completely unprepared to care for this creature.

“What are you thinking about?” Sarah asked.

“Excuse me?”

“It’s your move.”

“Oh.” I studied the board. She was moving me around. I could sense the end coming. “I guess I need to move my king.”

“I love you, Dad.” This came from nowhere.

I looked at her face, but she was staring at the pieces in front of her. “I love you too, bug.”

“Do you like baths?”

“What?”

“Baths, do you like them?”

“I suppose. Gotta get clean every now and then. Why?”

“Theresa says that baths are better than sleep.”

“Better how?”

“I don’t know. More restful, I guess. I told her I didn’t like sleeping and she said I should take baths.”

“Why don’t you like sleeping?”

“I don’t know.”

Kb7

Rad1 Nb8