I let my tears roll and roll until they start to slow, tapering off one by one. My eyes sting and my throat feels hoarse and Maggie waits with me all the while.

“Did you just do music therapy on me without the music?” I eventually ask.

I catch a little laugh from her end of the phone and it’s the sweetest sound I’ve heard in a long time.

“You’re right,” I tell her. “I’ve been an awful friend. You’ve always been there for me, always, and I bailed on you. I’m so sorry and I understand if you hate me.”

I wish she was here. I wish I could look her in the eyes and tell her how wretched and unworthy of her friendship I am. Needing to move, I get up from the couch and pace the room.

“I don’t hate you,” she says. “I’m partially to blame. I should have told you how I felt sooner instead of bottling it up and exploding.”

“If you give me the chance, I swear I’ll make it up to you.”

“Of course I’ll give you the chance. Nobody’s perfect, least of all me.” She waits a few seconds before going on. “I’m sorry I was harsh with you. It’s okay that you’re still hurting. I’m sure Ryan is, too.”

I try to think of him for a second but I’m too exhausted. “I doubt it,” I say. “For all we know, he could be married by now.”

“I think we both know that he’s not.” I lean my forehead on the living room wall as Maggie pauses. “Maybe you should call him.”

No. No. No. No. No.

“I can’t. Too much has happened.”

“You can’t call him because you don’t want to, or you can’t call him because you’re afraid?”

I think about lying but I know there’s no point.

“Both,” I say, closing my eyes. “Please don’t ask me any more questions about him. I’d much rather hear about you. Which hospital is Grandma Noreen staying in? I’ll tell Jen to have Denny reach out to make sure she’s getting the best treatment. Or maybe he knows someone who works in the hospital. Also, what’s the address? I’m going to send Noreen a care package. And you. And your sister. Every day. Forever.”

“All right, relax, gift lady. Grandma is in a great hospital and is being treated like the queen that she is. I think her doctor has a crush on Hannah. She won’t admit it yet, but I know she likes him, too.”

“Well, that’s good, right?”

“Sure. He’s nice and young. And if it helps get Grandma extra attention, I’m all about pimping Hannah out. Teamwork makes the dream work.”